332: These Stories Should Be ILLEGAL 😭 | WeezyWTF & Akeem Woods Join DIYS
Dam Internet, You Scary!
Patrick Cloud, Tahir Moore
4.9 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 12 December 2025
⏱️ 72 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
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Today’s episode of Damn Internet, You Scary! gets absolutely UNHINGED. WeezyWTF (Decisions Decisions and WTF Media) and comedian Akeem Woods pull up with some of the wildest stories we’ve ever heard — from U-Haul threesomes to fake pregnancies to escape work, micro-penis escapes, getting robbed DURING sex, gay hookup apps, down-low drama, invoice scams, and why straight men are “too easy.”
Plus we break down the guy who scammed Google & Facebook out of $122 million, billionaire ethics, Teslas, braces, and parenting Black kids in 2024.
This episode is pure chaos. You’ve been warned.
🔥 TODAY’S GUESTS
Weezy WTF
• IG: @WeezyWTF
Akeem Woods
• IG: @AkeemWoods
• Tour Dates: AkeemWoods.com
⏱ CHAPTERS
00:00 – Intro & Guest Introductions
01:28 – Icebreakers & The Funniest Lies Ever Told
05:08 – Weezy’s Fake Pregnancy to Skip Work
06:46 – Akeem’s Micro-Penis Escape Story
10:33 – What “Top” Really Means (Gay Terminology 101)
11:10 – The U-Haul Threesome Story
14:30 – Period Sex Prep, Braces & Oral Sex Disasters
19:48 – Getting Braces Removed Just to Suck D***
22:12 – Teaching, Sexting Moms & Wild Parent Stories
27:12 – Dick Is Easy to Get? The Ease of Straight Men
31:14 – Weezy’s Story of Getting Robbed DURING Sex
36:55 – Down-Low Men & Post-Nut Clarity Fights
41:44 – Google & Facebook Scammed for $122 Million
47:11 – Weezy’s Employee Who Tried to Scam Her
53:35 – Are Billionaires Automatically Bad People?
1:05:05 – Raising Black Kids & The Reality of Work
1:08:27 – Final Topics + Guest Plugs
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | The weather. Tomorrow, expect a biting cold front. Hmm, how naughty. I wonder what I'll be |
| 0:06.8 | wearing or taking off. The night will be wild and untamed. Expect heavy, lashing rain |
| 0:13.0 | that'll soak you to the skin. By Monday, temperatures will rise slowly but surely reaching |
| 0:18.7 | their peak in the afternoon. |
| 0:23.0 | Not in the mood for miserable weather. |
| 0:25.8 | Fly cheaply to Turkey with Sun Express. |
| 0:28.7 | Sun Express, nonstop sunshine. |
| 0:30.5 | Hey, what's up, guys? |
| 0:31.4 | I'm to hear more. |
| 0:32.3 | I'm Patrick Cloud. |
| 0:35.0 | And this is another episode of, damn, Internet. |
| 0:36.1 | You're scary. |
| 0:39.5 | Today, we are joined by some amazing people, man excited to have them on the podcast man we're about to kick it off and it's going to be a great show |
| 0:43.8 | first of almost man we got the homie of king from new york amazing comedian commentary |
| 0:49.4 | just all around dope-ass person king Kim, what's going on, baby? |
| 0:55.5 | What's up? |
| 0:58.4 | They finally meet you, man. |
| 0:59.6 | Whoa, Jamaicans. |
| 1:02.3 | Whoa, Jamaicans? |
| 1:04.1 | Bubba clot. |
| 1:06.5 | Whoa, Jamaica. We're excited to have people on, so we want to share the excitement. |
| 1:10.1 | We want them to feel the presence of our excitement. |
... |
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