#312: How Love Addicts Can Find Love (4 Ways for Each Archetype)
Black Girls Heal
Shena Lashey
4.8 • 1.7K Ratings
🗓️ 11 November 2025
⏱️ 35 minutes
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Summary
In this episode, Shena explores the four archetypes of love addicts. She unpacks their unique strengths, their fatal flaws, and what healthy love looks like for each type.
If you’ve ever felt trapped in the same relationship patterns or struggled to understand why love feels so intense yet painful, this episode will help you see yourself with compassion — and give you language to begin your healing journey.
Click here to enroll in the BGH Method, our 90 day recovery accelator for love addicts and love avoidants to heal their relationships, unresolved trauma and improve their relationship with themselves
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | My job is to somehow make them curious enough or persuade them by hook or crow to get more aware of themselves and where they came from and what they are into and what is already there. |
| 0:20.0 | Just to bring it out. This is what |
| 0:22.1 | compels me to compel them. And I will do it by whatever means necessary. Welcome to the Black |
| 0:30.2 | Girls Hill podcast where we talk about healing our intimacy disorders and resolve trauma |
| 0:35.0 | and building a healthy relationship with first ourselves and then |
| 0:38.6 | others. Every episode, we will talk about advice you can apply today to bring unhealthy patterns |
| 0:44.4 | and grow in your self-work. I'm Sheena Lachay, love addiction coach and trauma specialist. Let's begin. |
| 0:53.0 | Hello, hello. Welcome to the latest episode of Black Girls' Heal. |
| 0:56.1 | Today we are talking about the four different archetypes of love addicts. |
| 1:00.1 | There are prized qualities of what makes them amazing women. |
| 1:03.9 | Their fatal flaw that keeps them away from getting the type of love that they want. |
| 1:08.2 | And then what does it look like for them to actually be in love? |
| 1:11.1 | What is it that they should aspire to in their dream relationships? |
| 1:15.6 | Love addiction is an intimacy disorder that is defined by the persistent obsession of a person, |
| 1:20.4 | a relationship, or the fantasy of that person in relationship and mistaking that intensity for love. |
| 1:26.7 | So because I feel so strongly because I'm still |
| 1:28.8 | here, because we can't just stay away from each other, this must be love when really is a trauma |
| 1:33.5 | reenactment. And the reason why I talk about love addiction versus anxious attachment or |
| 1:38.7 | avoiding attachments, which are all parts of the intimacy disorder language, is because for those of us who struggle with love addiction, |
| 1:45.9 | we find that no matter what is happening, no matter what the consequences are, no matter how much |
| 1:50.5 | is affecting us emotionally, socially, mentally, spiritually, financially, we will stay connected |
| 1:56.1 | to that relationship. We will try to resolve it. And if not, that current relationship is a |
... |
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