269. Interdependence, Earned Security, and the Art of Being Unsingle ft. Amy Chan
Finding Mr. Height: The Podcast
Ali Jackson
3.9 • 712 Ratings
🗓️ 13 April 2026
⏱️ 65 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Amy Chan returns to the pod for an in-person recording with Ali, a conversation spurned from her own deep attachment work. The two chat about Amy’s new book Unsingle, where she leverages her personal experiences to help you identify your recurring patterns in relationships. The two get into why you keep choosing the same person in a different body (and how to actually change that), the mechanics of dating from first swipe to long-term commitment, and what healthy interdependence looks like.
In Updates, Ali shares a packed couple of weeks including a Broadway show, an intentionally unplanned weekend with Skyline, and a healing curly hair journey that’s going swimmingly.
This week's Media Mention is: "Portfolio Careers Are Meant for Generalists" from On Work by Shaina Anderson (Substack), shared by past guest Miriam Tinney on Instagram.
Where to find Amy: On Instagram @missamychan, on TikTok @missamychan, at www.missamychan.com.
Pre-Order Amy's book "Unsingle How to Date Smarter and Create Love That Lasts" Here: https://missamychan.com/unsingle/
Timestamps: Amy joins us at around minute 24.
Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqs
If you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .
Thanks to this week’s partners:
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I'm never going to find love. |
| 0:01.1 | There's something wrong with me. |
| 0:02.0 | It's my age. |
| 0:02.7 | It's my city. |
| 0:03.5 | Or then you start blaming externally. |
| 0:05.7 | Like, there's no good guys out there. |
| 0:07.3 | They're all just pigs. |
| 0:08.3 | They're all just ghosting. |
| 0:09.3 | And then they will be. |
| 0:24.8 | Hello and welcome to another episode of Fighting Mr. Hyde the podcast. I'm your host, Ali Jackson, and I am bringing you my positive and practical approach to dating relationships |
| 0:28.6 | and a whole lot else about life from my lived experience. Hello, welcome. Thank you for being |
| 0:34.8 | here. I am pumped about this week's episode. It is one that I recorded in |
| 0:40.2 | person and I love when I get to record with guests in person. This guest has been on the pod before. |
| 0:45.5 | A long time ago, though. It is Amy Chan. She was on the pod back in the work days, back when we did |
| 0:51.6 | like a breakup series. She was on the pod talking about her breakup boot camp work. That was the title of her first book. And she runs breakup boot camps for women. And it was an incredible episode. And she has a new book coming out. Her new book is called Unsingle. And she was in New York kind of like doing a press tour, going a different podcast and things like |
| 1:11.1 | that. And so we got to meet in person and we recorded in a studio actually, which was super |
| 1:15.7 | fun. I'm just pumped for you to hear this episode. I know I've used the word pumped already. |
| 1:21.0 | Amy has been in the dating and relationship space for years. And one of the things that I love about |
| 1:25.9 | her work is how much she brings her own personal |
| 1:27.9 | story into it. She does that in this book and we talk about it in this interview. It's just so |
| 1:33.7 | relatable. And it's coming from a place of like, I worked on this shit and here's how, here's how it |
| 1:40.2 | worked for me. And as you know, I love that approach. We get into attachment styles, |
... |
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