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HERself

208. Erin & Stephen on The Hardest Decisions Couples Make (Adding Another Baby, Conflict, and Self-Awareness)

HERself

Abby and Amy

Grow, Health & Fitness, Education, Mental Health, Parenting, Kids & Family, Opportunity, Honest, Real, Vulnerable, Purpose, Best Self, Self-improvement, Future, Comparison

4.8 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 20 November 2023

⏱️ 78 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

We are sharing the microphone with a married couple who also happen to be couples counselors specifically for parents. Erin and Stephen Mitchell join us today to talk about the tough decisions we have to make as parents, starting with do we want to have more kids? They go into their own story on this very subject and share the struggles they had to overcome to come to a final decision. Not only do they bring the humanity behind therapy, but also with Stephen’s PhD in medical family therapy and Erin’s masters in counseling and psychology, they’re able to bring in so much more.


We know that the decision of how many children to have shows up constantly for this community. Some couples can fight on this topic for months and months, some even years. Erin and Stephen share what you should be asking yourselves, as individuals, if this is a topic of tension in your household. And what about if you’re grid locked - one person is a no and the other is a yes. They share how you can move forward in this situation.


Finances are another topic of discussion that cause stress for couples. Do you feel like you can never get on the same page as your partner when it comes to money? And what about a career change? How do you decide as a couple if this is the next right move for your family? Erin and Stephen bring forth the idea of asking what the truth behind the story we are telling ourselves is with these issues. They also share how to help your partner feel seen and heard when their opinion differs from your own.


We both had so much to reflect on after this conversation. Erin and Stephen still have issues, even though they are experts in this area. We all have things that we can continue to work on inside our relationships. And, when we throw kids in the mix, it only elevates the demands and responsibilities we feel when making tough decisions. We hope this episode allows you and your partner to revisit some of the stories underneath the surface and that together, as a couple, you can understand each other just a little bit better and decision fatigue can be less of a burden.


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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Your partner's story, their experience and their emotions and their thoughts around what is happening matter.

0:07.0

It doesn't matter if you agree with it or not or if you think it should or shouldn't.

0:11.0

The point is just trying to hear it and say like okay like I don't know if I understand,

0:17.2

help me understand.

0:18.6

I'm Amy and I'm Abby and as women we are constantly comparing ourselves to others

0:28.5

but your life isn't supposed to look like hers. Being your best self means standing firm in

0:34.8

your decisions and always being willing to grow with a purpose. We get vulnerable and

0:39.6

real with an honest look into the challenges and triumphs we all face.

0:44.0

Every woman listening gets the opportunity to choose what life looks like for herself. Today on the podcast we are lucky enough to share the microphone with a

0:59.1

married couple who also happened to be couples counselors specifically for parents.

1:04.0

So we talk about the tough questions and decisions that we have to make as parents

1:08.5

starting with, do we want to have more kids?

1:11.0

And Stephen and Aaron go into their story,

1:14.4

their background story, their thought process with it.

1:17.0

They're able to bring in the humanity behind therapy,

1:19.6

but then also with a PhD in medical family therapy

1:22.0

and Aaron with a master's and counseling

1:23.4

psychology they're able to bring in so much more of what we should be doing and

1:27.4

seeing and achieving more in our relationships. So with this let's get into some

1:32.0

practical tools for couples to connect and then stay

1:35.0

connected through the chaos of parenting with Aaron and Stephen.

1:39.4

Your business and account is unique given that you guys provide couples counseling as a married couple.

...

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