My job is to somehow make them curious enough or persuade them by hook or crew to get more aware of themselves and where they came from and what they are into and what is already there.

Just to bring it out, this is what compels me to compel them and I will do it by whatever means necessary.

Welcome to the Black Girl's Hill podcast, where we talk about healing or intimacy disorders and resolve trauma and building a healthy relationship with first ourselves and then others.

Every episode we will talk about advice you can apply today to break unhealthy patterns and grow your self-worth.

I'm Shrinella Shay, love edition coach and trauma specialist. Let's begin.

Hello, hello, welcome to the Black Girl's Hill podcast. I am so happy that you are here and today we are going to be starting off with one of our foundational episodes.

So if you are up to date, I talked about in last week's episode how I am one of the transitions that I'm going to be making with this podcast is really doubling down on making sure that we are all growing together.

So many of you binge and have your favorite episodes that you listen to. Here we have a whole framework on how I help them and go from being love addicted to love balance love of when until available and love deprived to love nourished.

And so I want to make sure that I am teaching concepts that everyone can hear that may have missed it.

So we are starting from the beginning. And so today I'm going to be talking about the roadmap to go from being love addicted to love love balance.

And so sorry, I'm kind of blanking on what the path is. And so we actually have a freebie that's going to be the next step that I'm going to suggest for everybody.

There's a free download is called the five set roadmap and thousands of you have already downloaded it before. However, I've made updates. And so that's part of what we're going to be talking about today as I have coach women over the last coach and therapist women over the last.

I need to do math now 14 years 14 years or so. I have expanded what that roadmap looks like. So some of the steps are going to be the same and some are going to be different.

So we're going to do this for each of the role maps today is love addiction. So if that is what you are ready to hear about, then you are in luck. So let's go ahead and get started.

Thanks for listening to this week's podcast before we get started. Let's take a small break to say thank you to this week sponsors.

So what is love addiction love addiction is the persistent obsession of a person a relationship with a fantasy of a personal relationship and mistaking that your obsession mistaking that intensity around that person mistaking it for love.

And I was just talking with someone about this today about how easy it is for most people, but especially for those who struggle with love addiction to fall in love so quickly.

And on a world where I'll probably do episode about this in a world where people are catfishing not by pictures not by what they wear not by you know changing their identity, but they're catfishing by talking about emotionally intelligent things and you know really laying on what they know that you want in a world where we're all talking about soft life and being provided for or being adored or having someone who knows how to listen is very easy for those who are still predators.

To take that to take that their own role map with what those components are and lay a great little trap for you and so is very easy to fall for that and is very easy for those of us who are still struggling with our self worth struggling with knowing what we want to deserve.

Or you know we've had a long history of relationships that didn't show up in the way that we wanted it to when we meet someone who seems really amazing and seems really great and seems different than the others instead of us taking our time instead of us allowing space for us to get to know them.

And to see them through the seasons you know one thing that I've said that I've not always lived by so I'm going to be the first one to be honest but one thing that I learned and grad school that I would really encourage all of us I'm going to say all of us even though I know there's nuances in everybody's story.

But something that I learned and grad school when I was studying for marriage and family therapy that I would really encourage everyone here who listens to this podcast to follow is that you allow yourself a year of getting to know someone and why do I say a year I know some people say two years I know some people say a few months and I know some people say half a year I know some people are like five years.

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