Welcome back to the savvy psychologist. I'm Dr. Ellen Hendrickson and every week I'll help you meet life's challenges with evidence-based research, a sympathetic ear, and zero judgment.

Why did the narcissistic parent cross the road? They thought it was your boundaries.

Last week's episode on Toxic Family members resonated with lots of

listeners. Garrett from Oklahoma wrote in and asked to hear more about the effects of

being raised by a narcissist. Now, narcissists are like the sun. They make everyone

orbit around them. But what happens when someone pathologically vain and egotistical

also happens to be your dad or mom. What are you taught about yourself,

the world, and your place in it? What are the glitches in your worldview you don't even see

because to you they're normal. For the most part kids in healthy

families grow up to believe themselves to be worthy, capable, and lovable. But a

narcissistic parent can mess with all these things. So this week

we'll cover six beliefs that are planted when you're raised by a narcissist. The good

news you can uproot all these lessons and cultivate new beliefs about your worth and purpose.

Belief number one is, it's normal to have two faces.

Kids of narcissists learn it's normal to show one face to the world, but

wear another behind closed doors. Narcissists thrive on constant admiration, so they learn to charm and seduce at least in public, but in private they are

needy, critical, and demanding.

Many narcissists are pillars of the community or ardent philanthropists simply because it helps their image.

If this was your parent, you may have gotten used to people approaching and saying things,

like your dad is the greatest, or I just love your mom how lucky you are but you knew that after the

microphone was turned off or the fundraising gala confetti was swept up mom or dad's

commitment to the cause ended.

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