#151: Grieving Being Let Down at Your Big Events
Black Girls Heal
Shena Lashey
4.8 • 1.8K Ratings
🗓️ 16 August 2022
⏱️ 48 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Sometimes family and loved ones don't rise to the occassion and show up for us as we need them to at our big events (i.e. weddings, graduations, birthday parties, child births, etc). This abandonment is a real form of trauma.
In this episode, I discuss what to do to emotionally prepare yourself if you have an event coming that you fear you may be disappointed and also coping with your feelings if something hurtful has happened before.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | My, my job is to somehow make them curious enough and persuade them by hookah crew to get |
| 0:14.4 | more aware of themselves and where they came from and what they are into and what is already |
| 0:19.3 | there just to bring it out. This is what compels me to compel them and I will do it by whatever |
| 0:26.4 | means necessary. Welcome to the Black Girl's Hill podcast where we talk about |
| 0:32.4 | healing or intimacy disorders, members of trauma and building a healthy relationship with |
| 0:37.1 | first ourselves and then others. Every episode we will talk about advice you can apply today |
| 0:43.0 | to break unhealthy patterns and grow your self-worth. I'm Shrinella Shea, love addition coach |
| 0:48.5 | trauma specialist. Let's begin. Hello, hello and welcome to the latest episode of Black Girl's |
| 0:56.8 | Hill. I hope that you are shining and thriving wherever you are. I'm sending you all the love |
| 1:02.5 | and comfort and praise. I'm praising you. I'm celebrating you. I am sending you so much joy |
| 1:09.0 | and I hope that you receive it through the airwaves and I hope you are having your best day |
| 1:13.7 | and taking care of yourselves. So today's episode is going to be about grieving being let down at |
| 1:21.6 | our big events. So by big events, I mean things like weddings, graduations, birthday parties, |
| 1:28.4 | anniversaries, funerals, even medical operations, any live-changing or traumatic situations, |
| 1:36.0 | even natural disasters and just really needing support and to be rallied around at those types of |
| 1:42.4 | things. Any big events that you have an expectation and it's not a strange expectation, it's not |
| 1:48.9 | an abnormal one. It's just part of the general consensus that at these events, you should be |
| 1:54.1 | surrounded by family, by friends, by people who are happy for you, by people who are celebrating you. |
| 2:00.0 | But at those events, it's their traumatic. Either people don't show up for you. They make it about |
| 2:07.9 | them. They use it against you. They purposely ruin it. They try to take control of it. They try |
| 2:17.2 | to shame you for wanting to be celebrated, for wanting the focus to be on you, for you wanting |
| 2:22.5 | to be seen. They require you to share the spotlight with them or someone else. If there's a favorite |
... |
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