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Java with Juli

Authentic Intimacy®

Society & Culture, Relationships, Christianity, Christian, Religion & Spirituality, Julislattery, Pornography, Biblicalsexuality, Ihatesex, Ismasturbationasin, Authenticintimacy

4.81.5K Ratings

Overview

Join clinical psychologist Dr. Juli Slattery as she gets to the heart of what the Bible says about sex, singleness, marriage and intimacy. A ministry of Authentic Intimacy.

72 Episodes

#517 How to Beat Loneliness and Cultivate Deeper Friendships

Why are we all so lonely? Why is it that at a time when we are more connected than ever, many of us find ourselves feeling lonely and isolated? Jeff Kemp and Juli explore what’s making us feel lonely, how to bring more vulnerability and honesty into our relationships, and why understanding our identities is pivotal when it comes to cultivating deep, long-lasting friendships. Guest: Jeff Kemp Jeff’s Website: jeffkempteam.com Book: Receive: The Way of Jesus for Men by Jeff Kemp Book: Level 5 Friendship Playbook (download through the pop up on his website) Register for Reclaim: Surrendered Sexuality with code: JWJ24* *code only works for first four registrations Find out more about Reclaim: Surrendered Sexuality Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 13 May 2024

#516 Don't Skip Foreplay! (and Other Advice from a Christian Sex Therapist)

Married sexuality has its challenges, internal and external, and it can be tempting to quit having sex or step outside the marriage, but there are ways to address some of the issues and overcome them as a couple. Christian sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma joins Juli to talk about: How to manage mismatched libidos Why foreplay matters What to do if you experience symptoms of Erectile Dysfunction Why sex is important in marriage How to re-enter holy sexuality and eroticism after abstaining without it becoming sin Guest: Dr. Michael Sytsma Website: Building Intimate Marriages Instagram: @buildingintimatemarriages Explore more resources on Sex in Marriage Sign up for Second Cup! Learn more about becoming a member. Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 6 May 2024

#515 Is Attraction Sinful? Unpacking Attachment, Safety, Love and Desire

What do your attractions say about you? Do they say anything about you? Is attraction always about sex, or are there more layers to it than we tend to think? Hannah Nitz joins Juli for a conversation all about attraction and desire. Co-host: Hannah Nitz Hannah’s Website: hannahnitz.com Hannah’s Instagram: @hannahnitz Blog: 3 Subconscious Beliefs You May Hold About Living With Same-Sex Attraction Partner with AI! Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 29 April 2024

#514 How Deconstruction and Divorce Rocked a Young Couple's Life

For most marriages, the most challenging years are the earliest ones. Marital problems can come in any number of forms, but sometimes the most difficult to navigate are those you don’t see coming. Few know this better than Chris and Stephanie Teague, the duo behind Out of the Dust, who experienced divorce suddenly after only three and a half years of marriage. The couple join Juli to discuss exactly what happened before their marriage fell apart, and what God did in both of them to put it back together. Guests: Out of the Dust (Chris and Stephanie Teague) Website: outofthedustmusic.com Instagram: @outofthedustmusic Check out the new album from Out of the Dust, releasing April 26th! Q&A: Where do I begin healing? Explore more resources on healing Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 22 April 2024

#513 A Child Psychiatrist On The Truth About Transgender Activism

Gender dysphoria is becoming more and more common, and parents with kids who are struggling are at a loss at what to do. Should they affirm their kids? Should they approve hormone blockers? In this week’s episode of Java with Juli, Juli is joined by Dr. Miriam Grossman, a child psychiatrist and author who has testified before congress about some of the hidden dangers behind transgender activism. Guest: Dr. Miriam Grossman, MD Book: "Lost in Trans Nation: A Child Psychiatrist's Guide Out of the Madness" by Miriam Grossman M.D. Book: “You’re Teaching my Child What?!” by Miriam Grossman M.D. Java with Juli: #507 What You Need To Know About The Gender Conversation Java with Juli: #508 What Does Healthy Masculinity Actually Look Like? Check out more resources about sex and culture! Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 15 April 2024

#512 Friends Who Hurt Us: How To Recognize Unlikely Sources Of Abuse

While many of us are familiar with the concept of abuse, we are typically familiar with the conventional stereotypes around abuse. We typically picture a younger, weaker party who is taken advantage of by a dominant person. It’s rare we picture a friend, mentor or someone we trust harming us. Unfortunately this is what happened to Tricia Lott Williford. In the same 72-hour span in which she experienced the sudden and unexpected death of her husband, she experienced sexual assault from someone she considered a friend and a mentor. Tricia and her therapist, Jana Richardson, join Juli to talk about how to recognize, fight, and recover from abuse in all its forms. Guests: Tricia Lott Williford and Jana Richardson Website: tricialottwilliford.com Instagram: @tricialottwilliford Book: You Are Safe Now by Tricia Lott Williford and Jana Richardson, MA, LPC, EMDR Book: And Life Comes Back by Tricia Lott Williford Java with Juli: #497 Trying to Heal? Here’s Why Knowing Your Story is Essential Blog: How Do I Know If I’m in an Abusive Relationship? Blog: As Christians, How Do We Respond to Abuse Allegations in the Church? If you're a member, we’ll be discussing this episode in more depth and taking your questions, live, during Second Cup tomorrow, April 9. Members, sign up for Second Cup here! If you're not a member you can learn more here. Learn more about the Authentic Intimacy member community Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 8 April 2024

#511 Why You Need to Laugh More

Is laughter important? Why did God give us the ability to laugh? Laughter might not be top of mind when it comes to how we live as Christians or how we live in relationship with others, but laughter is a gift God has given to us, and there are many reasons why. This week, comedian, author and Pastor Ted Cunningham is Juli’s guest, and he explains the health and relational benefits of laughing much and laughing often. Guest: Ted Cunningham Website: Woodland Hills Church Book: A Love That Laughs by Ted Cunningham Blog: Your Marriage Should Be Fun Partner with Authentic Intimacy Join the Love Like You Mean it Cruise in 2025! Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 1 April 2024

#510 Influencer Anh Lin on Overcoming Trauma and Living a Beautiful Life

Accidental influencer and author of “Forever Home”, Anh Lin, shares her story of journeying through trauma and brokenness to a place of healing. You’ll hear Anh talk about: Her unlikely encounter with Jesus How she medicated her pain and grief with partying and alcohol Experiencing rock bottom, even after finding Jesus Guest: Anh Lin Anh’s website: girlandtheword.com Anh’s Instagram: @girlandtheword Book: “Forever Home: Moving Beyond Brokenness to Build a Strong and Beautiful Life” by Anh Lin Blog: How Do I Know If I’m in an Abusive Relationship? Blog: Don’t Waste the Pain Sign up for Second Cup on April 9th! Learn more about the Authentic Intimacy member community This is the last episode you’ll be able to listen to on your Google Podcasts App. If you usually listen to Google Podcasts, don’t worry, our episodes are still available on YouTube and Spotify, or if you’re an iPhone user, you can find us on Apple Podcasts as well. Make sure to subscribe to us on Apple Podcasts, on YouTube, or on Spotify. Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness

Transcribed - Published: 25 March 2024

#509 Workaholism And Infidelity Almost Led To Divorce, But A Miracle Saved Their Marriage

David and Terri Sumlin are the founders of Marriage Life Ministries, a ministry that helps couples improve their marriages through a focus on communication, conflict and intimacy. Years ago, when their own marriage was on the brink of divorce and rocked by a 3-month affair, this ministry was exactly what they needed. Join Juli, David and Terri, as the couple talk about how God’s intervention saved and restored their marriage. Guests: David and Terri Sumlin David and Terri’s Website: marriagelifeministries.com/ David and Terri’s Instagram: @marriagelifeministries Blog: Forgiveness is Hard, Grace is Harder Find out more about becoming an Authentic Intimacy member! Google Podcasts is closing at the end of March. Make sure you’re subscribed to Java with Juli on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 18 March 2024

#508 What Does Healthy Masculinity Actually Look Like?

What can we learn from close examination of the lives of the men we read about in scripture? These were real people,who the Bible reveals had their own very human struggles, battling insecurity, pride, deception, and lust. This week’s podcast guest, Chase Replogle, is a pastor at Bent Oak Church in Missouri, and is the author of “The Five Masculine Instincts". The book covers the lessons we can learn from male Biblical figures like Samson, Moses, and Cain. This is a great episode that discusses some common motivators for men (and women), and offers guidance on how to address inner motivations that push us further from God’s heart and calling on our lives. Guest: Chase Replogle Website: chasereplogle.com/ Instagram: @thepastorwriter Find out more about becoming an Authentic Intimacy member! Google Podcasts is closing at the end of March. Make sure you’re subscribed to Java with Juli on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 11 March 2024

#507 What You Need To Know About The Gender Conversation

Is there a theological approach or framework to understanding gender? Is there scriptural support for the messages we receive about gender from movies, books, and institutions? And what does it mean for us to live as ‘lights on a hill’ within a culture that continually evolves in its discussions about gender and sexual issues? Join John and Sarah Stonestreet from the Colson Center as they join Juli in exploring some of the underlying beliefs surrounding sexuality in our culture, and talk about how we can embrace and pursue the good and beautiful narrative found in scripture. Guests: John and Sarah Stonestreet Website: The Colson Center Website: identityproject.tv/ Instagram: @thecolsoncenter Google Podcasts is closing at the end of March. Make sure you’re subscribed to Java with Juli on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 4 March 2024

#506 How To Make Sense Of Grief And God's Goodness

Ed and Lisa Young, founding pastors of Fellowship Church, join Juli for an honest and faith-filled conversation about their journey through grief. The couple’s oldest daughter, Lee-Beth, passed away a little over two years ago after an ongoing battle with poor mental health and alcohol abuse, and in this powerful interview, they share about the unexpected comfort and hope they discovered as they wrestled with their pain, loss and sorrow and held their faith in tandem. Guests: Ed and Lisa Young Website: Fellowship Church Book: A Path Through Pain by Ed and Lisa Young Blog: How To Heal And Grow: Four Surprising Pathways To Christ-Likeness Blog: God’s Healing Stinks Sign up for Second Cup Become a Member

Transcribed - Published: 26 February 2024

#505 What Does it Look Like to Struggle with Sexual Sin and Still Love Jesus?

For too long, many Christians have heard and believed the misconception that living in God’s freedom and redemption means they’ll never struggle with sin or temptation. This is one of the things the Bible is pretty clear on. The heroes of the faith like Paul, David, Moses, and Abraham loved and new God and still lived imperfectly. Maybe it’s time for us to recognize that being saved doesn’t mean we’ll never sin again, but that it means we’re on a journey of loving Jesus, pursuing Him, falling short and returning to Him. This week’s podcast guest, Lina Abujamra, knows this well. She joins Juli to talk about what it looks like to spend a lifetime struggling with lust and sexual temptation, and still choose Jesus. Guest: Lina Abujamra Book: Don't Tell Anyone You're Reading This by Lina Abujamra Website: livingwithpower.org/ Q&A: What Is the Difference Between Sexual Integrity and Purity? Book: God, Sex, and Your Marriage by Dr. Juli Slattery Workbook: God, Sex, and Your Marriage by Dr. Juli Slattery Become a member!

Transcribed - Published: 19 February 2024

#504 Painful Intercourse, Fake Orgasms, And Aging Sex: Answers To The Most Popular Sex Questions

What does it look like to let God reclaim sex in your marriage…when sex is painful? Or when it feels like an obligation? Or when your spouse wants to engage in BDSM? In this special Live Q&A episode from Reclaim 2022, Juli is joined by Dr. Jennifer Degler and Dr. Michael Sytsma as they provide biblical, practical answers to questions on sex that some of us are too afraid to ask. Guests: Dr. Jennifer Degler and Dr. Michael Sytsma Jennifer’s Website: jenniferdegler.com/ Mike’s Website: intimatemarriage.org/ Website: (American Board of Certified Sex Therapists) abcst.org Website: mycounselor.online Website: (International Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health) isswsh.org Blog: 3 Reasons Why “Faking It” is Making Your Bad Sex Life Even Worse Register for Reclaim! Become a Member

Transcribed - Published: 12 February 2024

#503 Lies, Pornography and Sex Addiction Almost Ended Their Marriage, Now They Help Others Find Hope

It’s one thing to hear someone say secrets and sexual addiction are destructive to a marriage and a family, it’s another thing entirely to experience it. Phil and Priscilla Fretwell understand this more than most. One afternoon, while her husband was at work, Priscilla got a call from the video store enquiring for an overdue video. Shocked and confused, she called her husband to ask him about it. His only response was: ‘I’m coming home’. Many years, tears and miracles later, Phil and Priscilla have seen God move in their hearts and in their marriage in ways they could never have imagined. Guests: Phil and Priscilla Fretwell Instagram: @savagemarriageministries Website: savagemarriageministries.com Podcast: The Savage Marriage Podcast Book: Savage Marriage: Triumph over Betrayal and Sexual Addiction Java with Juli: #482 Trying to Overcome a Sexual Addiction? Here’s Why You Can’t Do It Alone Blog: 5 Healthy Ways to Respond to Your Husband’s Porn Problem Sign up for Second Cup! Become an Authentic Intimacy Member! Register for Reclaim 2.0!

Transcribed - Published: 5 February 2024

#502 How to Understand and Overcome the Challenges of Postpartum Sex

Pregnancy has its ups and downs, but where the rubber hits the road for most is postpartum. If you’re a woman who has had a baby or you’re a man married to one, you understand that there are fairly common challenges specifically around postpartum sex. There’s a lot to navigate—changing bodies, new responsibilities, challenging hormones, it’s no wonder women struggle to figure out how they feel about sex and couples are hard pressed to find a new sexual rhythm. In this much-needed and highly requested podcast episode, Juli is joined by pelvic floor therapist Heather Marra, and Dr. Jennifer Degler as they explain why sex is so different postpartum, and what wives and their husbands can do about it. Guests: Dr. Jennifer Degler, and Heather Marra, PT, MPT Jennifer’s website: jenniferdegler.com/ Heather’s website: onesimplestep.today/ Jennifer’s Instagram: @drjenniferdegler Heather’s Instagram: @onesimplesteptoday Sign up for Reclaim 2.0! Blog: What If I Hate Sex? Java with Juli: #484 Duty Sex, Feeling Objectified, and Other Reasons Women Don’t Enjoy Sex in Marriage Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 29 January 2024

#501 Going Beyond a Superficial Faith - with guest Jackie Hill Perry

How do we move from a faith that is shallow and superficial to one that is rooted in relationship? What does it take to take a prayer life that feels like a duty and make it into one of delight? Author, teacher, and poet Jackie Hill Perry joins Juli to talk about the inspiration behind her latest book, “Upon Waking”, and why God isn’t looking at the amount of time we spend with Him so much as He’s looking at the condition of our hearts. Guest: Jackie Hill Perry Website: jackiehillperry.com Instagram: @jackiehillperry Book: Upon Waking by Jackie Hill Perry YouTube: With the Perrys Register for Reclaim 2.0 Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Transcribed - Published: 22 January 2024

#500 Sex, Faith and Family: Conversations Every Couple Should Have Pre-Marriage

We’ve all heard it said many times that marriage can be tough. But it’s possible we don’t discuss enough how good, sweet, and awesome marriage can be! Scott Kedersha, marriage pastor and author, joins Juli to share some of the things he’s learned in almost two decades of marriage ministry. In this episode, Juli and Scott discuss: How couples should handle sexual history and ongoing issues What qualities to look for in a potential spouse When to call off an engagement The role of prayer and spirituality in the dating relationship Whether you’re married, engaged, dating or single, this is an eye-opening episode guaranteed to help you navigate your intimate relationships with Godly wisdom and intention. Guest: Scott Kedersha Website: scottkedersha.com Book: Ready or Knot: 12 Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have Before Marriage by Scott Kedersha Book: The Ready or Knot Prayer Guide: 100 Prayers for Dating and Engaged Couples by Scott Kedersha Java with Juli: #494 Purity Culture, Men and Sexual Entitlement Blog: 4 Lies the Movies Told Us About Sex and The Truths You Need to Know Are you ready to claim your 1-year membership? Click here to visit the website and enter your code. Free membership code: Java500 Discount membership code: JJ10 Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery - Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness

Transcribed - Published: 15 January 2024

#499 How Vulnerability Can Help You Heal From Sexual Trauma

If you caught someone in sin, how would you respond to them? Tim Ross was 18 years old when his mother caught him watching porn. Her response was to ask one question: “What are you doing?” and then to turn, walk away, and pray. 30 years later that night remains seared in Tim’s memory as the night grace, mercy and truth reached in and pulled him out of darkness and into light. Tim tells Juli: What finally prompted him to share what he had been through How a faith-filled response led him to more vulnerability What he did to overcome his addiction to porn, and Why honesty and vulnerability are so necessary for our healing Guest: Tim Ross Tim’s Website: upsettheworld.com/ Tim’s Podcast: The Basement Register for Reclaim 2.0

Transcribed - Published: 8 January 2024

#498 The Surprising Thing You're Missing In Your Healing Journey

What’s getting in the way of you becoming more like Christ? Could it be that while your knowledge of God is good, you haven’t embraced how He has designed you on your journey to become more like Him? Author and consultant Michel Hendricks is the first guest of 2024 for Java with Juli. He shares what he has observed from his years working as a Pastor of Spiritual Formation, and what he has learned from adopting a more right-brained approach to discipleship and formation. His advice may surprise you. Guest: Michel Hendricks Book: The Other Half of Church by Michel Hendricks and Jim Wilder Website: Life Model Works Sign up for an Online Book Study

Transcribed - Published: 1 January 2024

#497 Trying to Heal? Here's Why Knowing Your Story is Essential

When was the last time you took time to reflect on your story? As you reflect on the year you’ve had, why not take some time to think more about your past and do some healing work? Cathy Loerzel, co-founder of The Allender Center and co-author of “Redeeming Heartache” joins Juli to talk about why sharing and hearing our stories helps us heal from past trauma and is crucial for cultivating emotional and spiritual maturity. Guest: Cathy Loerzel Website: cathyloerzel.com Cathy’s Instagram: @cathy.loerzel Book: Redeeming Heartache: How Past Suffering Reveals Our True Calling by Cathy Loerzel and Dr. Dan Allender Java with Juli: #479 More Than Just Behavior: Why Your Struggles With Sexual Sin Run Deeper Than You Think Donate

Transcribed - Published: 28 December 2023

#496 Seeking Truth on Singleness, Married Sexuality and LGBTQ+ Issues - A 2023 Recap

Join Juli and Hannah as they revisit some of the common themes, topics and questions from this year’s Java with Juli episodes. Juli and Hannah address some of the following questions: Can God reach the LGBTQ+ community? When did culture begin to emphasize sexual identity and pronouns? Have we made an idol of marriage and forgotten the dignity of singleness? Grab your coffee, get comfortable, and explore some of the common themes and lessons from 2023. Guest: Hannah Nitz Hannah’s Instagram: @hannahnitz Hannah’s Website: hannahnitz.com Java with Juli: #448: When Did Sexual Identity Become a Thing? (and Why Are We Obsessed With It?) Java with Juli: #455 How God Changed My Heart (Even After I Changed My Gender) with Laura Smalts Java with Juli: #450 Breaking the Marriage Idol Java with Juli: #464 Why We Need to Remember The Dignity of Singleness Java with Juli: #454 Mismatched in Sexual Desire? You May Be Closer Than You Think Java with Juli: #452 Porn Addiction in Marriage: How to Let God Redeem Your Story Sign up for our Virtual Conference Reclaim 2.0! Donate

Transcribed - Published: 18 December 2023

#495 Why Narratives About Sex Matter

What are the stories you’re telling yourself about who you are, about who God is, and about what life is supposed to look like? We’re all telling ourselves stories all the time. And those stories matter, because we interpret our experiences through them, and those narratives really heavily influence the choices we make and the people we become. Author Jennifer L Holberg joins Juli on the podcast to discuss her book, “Nourishing Narratives”, and explains why we need to challenge the narratives we’re given, embrace the metanarrative of scripture, and see how the stories we believe shape our faith. Guest: Jennifer L Holberg Book: Nourishing Narratives: The Power of Story to Shape Our Faith by Jennifer L Holberg Festival of Faith and Writing Java with Juli: #412: Is There a Better Way To Read the Bible? (Episode with Marty Solomon) Become a Member!

Transcribed - Published: 11 December 2023

#494 Purity Culture, Men and Sexual Entitlement

We all know the purity narrative had its downsides for women, but what about men? Is it possible the purity narrative failed men too? What were men taught to do with feelings of lust? What harmful ideas were passed on in an effort to protect purity? Noah Filipiak, author, pastor, and founder of Beyond Ministries, joins Juli to unpack some of the messages men heard, and provide insight on where things need to change. Guest: Noah Filipiak Noah’s Instagram: @noahfilipiak Noah’s Website: noahfilipiak.com Website: Beyond Ministries Book: Beyond the Battle by Noah Filipiak Book: Sacred Rhythms by Ruth Hayley Barton Book: Secrets of the Secret Place by Bob Sorge Register for Reclaim 2.0 Sign up for Noah’s Online Coaching Intensive

Transcribed - Published: 4 December 2023

#493 How the Bible’s Teachings About Sex Reveal God’s Goodness

Is God really good? This is a question many people today are left asking as they consider biblical values on sexuality. The Bible comments on everything from same-sex attraction, the heart of marriage, singleness, and the cost of discipleship, and in this episode Juli and her guest, author and pastor Sam Allberry, unpack these topics. Sam is a frequent guest on the podcast who talks with honesty, humility, and wisdom about a lot of the hot button sexual topics of our modern culture. Guest: Sam Allberry Sam’s Website: samallberry.com/ Book: God's Signpost: How Marriage Points Us to God's Love Book: Is God Anti-Gay? And Other Questions About Jesus, the Bible, and Same-Sex Sexuality Blog: Sexual Discipleship®: What Is It, and Why Is It Important? Blog: 3 Subconscious Beliefs You May Hold About Living With Same-Sex Attraction Learn More About Giving Tuesday

Transcribed - Published: 27 November 2023

#492 How Human Trafficking Causes Us to Rethink What We Believe About God

Even with all the scriptures tell us of God’s capacity for miracles, many of us still often wonder, “Is God able to heal me? Is He really greater than the challenges I face?” There aren’t many things that show the depths of sin and brokenness in humanity like the horror of human trafficking. If you’ve watched a documentary on human trafficking or know someone personally impacted by it, it’s clear there is so much brokenness in both the victims and their perpetrators. Thankfully, God is greater than all that needs healing, mercy, and grace in all of us. Charles Martin, author of fiction trilogy “The Keeper” Series joins Juli to unpack some of the realities of human trafficking, what it means to be broken, and what it takes to find freedom. Whether you’re struggling with shame about your sin or struggling to reconcile God’s mercy and forgiveness with the sins of others, this is for you. Guest: Charles Martin Book: It is Finished by Charles Martin Book: Anything is Possible by Joby Martin and Charles Martin Books from “The Keeper” Series: Book: The Water Keeper by Charles Martin Book: The Letter Keeper by Charles Martin Book: The Record Keeper by Charles Martin Website: charlesmartinbooks.com Webinar: Human Trafficking in Your City Java with Juli: #296: An Insider’s Story of Human Trafficking Donate

Transcribed - Published: 20 November 2023

#491 Why Debates About Women's Roles Might be Missing the Point

Are men and women called to have the same kind of roles? Are women supposed to support men but not lead them, or lead alongside them? This is a sensitive ongoing discussion in the American Church. In this episode, author and esteemed theologian Dr. Michelle Lee-Barnewall joins Juli to discuss why this debate misses God’s heart for how men and women should relate to each other in the family of God. Guest: Dr. Michelle Lee-Barnewall Book: Neither Complementarian nor Egalitarian by Dr. Michelle Lee-Barnewall Java with Juli: #470 Why Did We Start Hating Men? The Toxic War on Masculinity with Nancy Pearcey Blog: What Submission Isn’t Blog: So What Exactly Is Biblical Submission?

Transcribed - Published: 13 November 2023

#490 How Do You Go From Being Stuck in Bondage to True Freedom?

On the journey of healing and recovery, it can be easy to wonder if things will “always be this way”, or feel like the challenges “will never stop”. The reality is that it often takes more than we expect to go from death to life. While the Bible says that real and lasting transformation is available to us, it can be hard to understand what part we have to play and where God is doing the work. Jonathan Daugherty, founder of Be Broken Ministries, will tell you true transformation is grace-led. He joins Juli to discuss his new book where he explores and outlines how God uses our pain, restores our identity, and renews us along our healing journeys through the miraculous power of His grace. Guest: Jonathan Daugherty Be Broken Ministries on Instagram: @bebrokenministries Website: Be Broken Ministries Book: Grace-Based Transformation by Jonathan Daugherty Blog: God’s Healing Stinks Blog: Why Is Healing So Hard? Java with Juli: #438: How Your Story Becomes Sacred in the Hands of Jesus Interested in becoming a member? Join us for Open House Already a member? Register for Second Cup Sign up for Jonathan’s Coaching Intensive

Transcribed - Published: 6 November 2023

#489 Thinking About Divorce? You Might Want to Listen to This First

In marriages where one or both partners are unhappy, divorce is a very real consideration. But imagine that you sit down with a divorce attorney, tell her you and your spouse argue all the time and can’t see eye to eye, and after nodding quietly, she gives you the following advice: before you split, take inventory. Sound unconventional? This is the advice from divorce attorney Toni Nieuwhof, who, along with her husband, pastor-turned-leader-coach Carey Nieuwhof, has seen many couples walk through marital trouble and divorce. Whether you’re walking through a tough season in your marriage or are currently contemplating divorce, this is a podcast episode that can encourage you and create fresh motivation to nurture your relationship with your spouse. Guests: Toni and Carey Nieuwhof Book: Before You Split by Toni Nieuwhof Blog: How Do I Know If I'm in an Abusive Relationship? Java with Juli: #466 Enough is Enough: Recognizing and Combating Abusive Relationships Book: When Sorry Isn’t Enough by Gary Chapman and Jen Thomas Join us for Reclaim 2.0 Virtual Conference!

Transcribed - Published: 30 October 2023

#363 (Bonus) Why Are Christians Afraid Of the LGBTQ+ Conversation?

Do you actually have a Biblical sexual ethic? Do you know what the scripture says about your sexuality? Or have you simply made assumptions about what the Bible says about sex based on what you’ve heard others say? In this timely and necessary special edition bonus episode rounding out our series on various topics around God, sex and intimacy, Rachel Gilson joins Juli to discuss why it’s more important than ever to maintain a high view of the Bible, and know what the Bible actually says about our sexuality. Guest: Rachel Gilson Rachel’s Website: rachelgilson.com Book: Born Again This Way by Rachel Gilson Java with Juli: #312: Born Again This Way: Rachel’s Story Blog: How to Have Tough Conversations Become a Member!

Transcribed - Published: 26 October 2023

#488 What Does the Bible Really Say About Same-Sex Marriage?

Preston Sprinkle, author of “People to be Loved,” joins Juli on the podcast to discuss his latest book “Does the Bible Support Same-Sex Marriage?” and tackles arguably one of the most sensitive and hotly discussed topics of our time. Knowing what God’s Word says is growing increasingly important, and in this conversation Juli and Preston examine some of the beliefs and arguments surrounding sexuality through the lens of biblical truth. Guest: Preston Sprinkle Preston’s Twitter: @PrestonSprinkle Preston’s Instagram: @preston.sprinkle Preston’s Website: prestonsprinkle.com Book: Does the Bible Support Same-Sex Marriage? by Preston Sprinkle Book: People to Be Loved by Preston Sprinkle Blog: Can I Be Godly and Gay? Join us for Open House!

Transcribed - Published: 23 October 2023

#257 (Bonus) How Trauma Affects Our Bodies & Souls

As embodied, integrated beings the experiences we have, positive and negative alike, affect our souls, our bodies, and our minds. This means that regardless of whether a trauma you experienced was physical or emotional trauma, it leaves a mark on all of you. Susie Larson, author, speaker, and radio show host, joins Juli to explain how what we experience in life affects every part of us, and provides insight on how to journey toward healing when the scars run deep. Guest: Susie Larson Susie’s Instagram: @susielarsonauthor Susie’s Website: susielarson.com Book: Fully Alive by Susie Larson Book: Surprised by The Healer by Linda Dillow and Dr. Juli Slattery Java with Juli: #411: The Unlikely Means God Uses To Bring Beauty From Ashes Blog: Why Is Healing So Hard? Blog: Why We Must Be Surprised by the Healer Become a Member!

Transcribed - Published: 19 October 2023

#487 How to Cling to God When Your World is Falling Apart

How do you cling to your faith in God when life gets hard? What does it look like to have an unshakeable faith? And how do you cultivate it? Michele Cushatt, author, speaker, Bible-teacher, and 3-time cancer survivor, joins Juli in this honest, gritty, and hope-filled episode about knowing a God who meets us in our most painful places, and holding onto Him with all our hearts. Guest: Michele Cushatt Michele’s Instagram: @michelecushatt Website: michelecushatt.com Book: A Faith That Will Not Fail by Michele Cushatt Book: Undone by Michele Cushatt Java with Juli: #311: Where Is God When We Suffer? Java with Juli: #438: How Your Story Becomes Sacred in the Hands of Jesus Webinar: When You Feel Like Quitting (Member Exclusive)

Transcribed - Published: 16 October 2023

#316 (Bonus) Sorry Mom & Dad, the "Sex Talk" Doesn't Work

When it comes to educating kids about sexuality, a ‘one and done’ conversational approach is just not enough to equip them with the knowledge and understanding they need to make sense of sex and gender in our cultural landscape. So if that doesn’t work, what should we be doing? As we continue our series working through different themes around God and sexuality, Juli and Hannah Nitz sit down in this special edition bonus episode to explain what it looks like to teach your kids about biblical sexuality in our current cultural moment. Guest: Hannah Nitz Looking for more resources on talking to kids about sex? Click here Blog: Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Why, When, and How Blog: 5 Reasons You’re Not Talking to Your Kids About Sex (and How to Overcome Them) Blog: Sexual Integrity: The Heart of Sexually Discipling Your Kids Java with Juli: #486 Teaching Sexual Discipleship: How to Walk in Truth and Love with LGBTQ+ Kids

Transcribed - Published: 12 October 2023

#486 Teaching Sexual Discipleship: How to Walk in Truth and Love with LGBTQ+ Kids

How do we embrace the truth of God’s word while loving those He also calls us to love? What are some of the practical challenges of that when those we’re disagreeing with are our children? In this episode, Kelly Urbon, founder of Walk With Them, discusses the work she is doing in counseling and coaching parents and families of those who identify as LGBTQ+, and explains why it is so necessary. Guest: Kelly Urbon Website: Walk With Them Java with Juli: #285 Loving Without Compromise (Member exclusive) Q&A: How Do I Love and Serve My LGBTQ Friends Without Being Offensive? Book: People to Be Loved by Preston Sprinkle

Transcribed - Published: 9 October 2023

#386 (Bonus) What's the Secret To Getting the Marriage & Intimacy You Want? Go Vertical

When Dave Wilson’s wife Ann told him she no longer had feelings for him, there are a number of responses he could have had. The one he chose might surprise you. Rather than lashing out in disbelief, Dave experienced the conviction of the Holy Spirit and went straight onto his knees in repentance. As God touched His heart, He touched Ann’s as well. Could it be that many of us are missing the supernatural element of our marriages? What would happen if we allowed God to do the work He seeks to do in us, so that He can heal our marriages? Join Juli and her guests Dave and Ann Wilson in this special re-air episode as they share how God transformed them and their marriage from the top down. Guests: Dave and Ann Wilson Book: Vertical Marriage by Dave and Ann Wilson Book: Finding the Hero in Your Husband, Revisited by Dr. Juli Slattery Website: Family Life Today Blog: I Love Being Bitter: How We Grow Bitter and 3 Ways to Overcome Java with Juli: #208: The Forgiveness & Intimacy Link

Transcribed - Published: 5 October 2023

#485 Your Marriage Won't Survive Without Grace: Why Marriages Built on Performance Fall Apart

When you’re trying to diagnose what’s missing in your marital relationship, chances are you probably won’t attribute challenges to a lack of grace. But what if grace is the missing piece? Brad and Marilyn Rhoads of Grace Marriage join Juli to share their story. They unpack how God showed them the key role grace had to play in their marriage, how it brought them closer, and how it helped brace their relationship through challenging emotional seasons. Guests: Brad and Marilyn Rhoads Grace Marriage’s Instagram: @grace_marriage Grace Marriage’s Facebook: Grace Marriage Website: gracemarriage.com Book: The Grace Marriage: How the Gospel and Intentionality Transform Your Relationship Java with Juli: #253: Making the Gospel Beautiful Through Relationships Blog: Forgiveness is Hard, Grace is Harder Blog: The Challenge of Grace

Transcribed - Published: 2 October 2023

#454 (Bonus) Mismatched in Sexual Desire? You May Be Closer Than You Think

If you’re a married person feeling like there’s a giant chasm between the level of sexual desire you and your spouse experience, this special re-air episode is for you. Through over two years of research and work, Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Michael Sytsma surveyed and documented numerous married couples, examining the way they connect around sexual intimacy in their marriage. They investigated trends, causality, and correlation all in a bid to help couples bridge the gaps they experience in their sexual intimacy, and their findings might just surprise you. Guests: Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Michael Sytsma Book: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference by Shaunti Feldhahn & Dr. Michael Sytsma Website: Building Intimate Marriages Explore more Authentic Intimacy resources on Sex in Marriage Partner with Authentic Intimacy!

Transcribed - Published: 28 September 2023

#484 Duty Sex, Feeling Objectified, and Other Reasons Women Don't Enjoy Sex in Marriage

It’s week three of our 7-week series exploring different themes around God, sex and intimacy, and this week, it’s all about sex in Marriage. Every couple wants a healthy, satisfying sex life, but achieving one isn’t always straightforward. What does it look like to build sexual intimacy when your spouse has a lower drive than you do? What is the most effective way for you to pursue your spouse? And is having sex with your spouse more frequently the answer to their porn addiction? Juli is joined by J Parker and Bonny Burns, the hosts of the podcast “Sex Chat for Christian Wives”, as they provide biblical, practical insight on the challenges Christian wives face in the marital context. If you missed last week’s episode, click here. Guests: J. Parker and Bonny Burns Podcast: Sex Chat for Christian Wives Book: Unlock Your Orgasm by Bonny Logsdon Burns Blog: Five Things You Need to Know About Women, Orgasm & Intimacy Check out our Online Coaching Intensives!

Transcribed - Published: 25 September 2023

#388 (Bonus) Single & Sexually Whole

If God made you sexual and you’re single, what are you supposed to do with your sexual desires? It’s true that the path to sexual integrity for the single believer has long been a rocky one. When a Christian man or woman experiences attraction and rising hormones, is he or she supposed to ignore or suppress their sexuality? Or is there more to being a sexual being than we’ve previously given thought to? In this special edition bonus episode, Juli is joined by the late Dr. Doug Rosenau, and they discuss different types of sexuality, the priority people place on them, and what we’re supposed to do when we experience desire. Guest: Dr. Doug Rosenau Book: Soul Virgins by Dr. Doug Rosenau Blog: What Do I Do With My Sexual Desires? Blog: You Can Be Single & Sexual

Transcribed - Published: 21 September 2023

#483 Why You Need a New Theology of Singleness, Even if You're Married

Join Juli and her guest Dr. Danielle Treweek as we kick off week two of our 7-week series exploring various themes around God, sex and intimacy. This week we look at singleness and ask the question: Have we as the Church misrepresented and misunderstood singleness? Dani is the author of “The Meaning of Singleness,” a book which seeks to help individuals and the Church recover a biblically accurate theology of singleness. Get ready for a conversation filled with grace, passion, and truth as Dani discusses some of what the Church has gotten wrong about the high calling of singleness. Guest: Danielle Treweek, PhD Dani’s Instagram: @danitreweek Dani’s Twitter: @danitreweek Book: The Meaning of Singleness by Danielle Treweek Website: danielletreweek.com Website: Single Minded Ministry Blog: What’s the Purpose of Your Sexuality, Really?

Transcribed - Published: 18 September 2023

#211 (Bonus) Understanding Pornography Addiction

Have you ever given thought to what drives people towards pornography? While for many the initial introduction to porn is due to curiosity, it might surprise you to know that there are many different emotional and cognitive reasons people continue to turn to porn and struggle to break the addiction. In this special edition bonus episode, revisit Juli and Jonathan Daughtery of Be Broken Ministries as Jonathan shares some of his story, and what he believes to be some of the many reasons people keep returning to “lustland.” Guest: Jonathan Daugherty Be Broken Ministries on Instagram: @bebrokenministries Be Broken Ministries Sign up for Jonathan Daugherty's Online Coaching Intensive! Blog: Porn Affects You, Even If You Don’t Look At It

Transcribed - Published: 14 September 2023

#482 Trying to Overcome a Sexual Addiction? Here's Why You Can't Do It Alone

This is the first episode in a 7-part series on different themes around God, sex, and intimacy, and is focused on how we can find freedom from sexual sin. In this episode, Juli is joined by podcaster, author, and former pastor Nate Larkin, as he shares about his journey breaking free from an addiction to pornography that almost destroyed his marriage. Website: Samson Society Wbsite: The Sarah Society Podcast: Pirate Monks Podcast Java with Juli: #241 Women Struggle With Porn Too Blog: What Should You Do If Your Husband Looks at Porn? Q&A: Is there any hope for me in my struggle with porn? Become an Authentic Intimacy member!

Transcribed - Published: 11 September 2023

#481 Learning, Leading, and Growing: A Reflection on 10 Years of Java with Juli

10 years of Java with Juli! It’s been 10 years since Java with Juli launched, and there have been over 400 podcast episodes aired in that time. Juli has talked about it all: divorce, porn and masturbation, same-sex attraction, discipling kids in biblical sexuality, gender identity, painful sex, and building marital intimacy. In this very special celebratory episode, Juli and Hannah sit down and talk about the heart and mission of Java with Juli, what Juli has learned over the last 10 years, and how she hopes to see it grow in the next decade. Grab your java, find a comfy spot, and dive into this 10 year celebratory episode. Guest: Hannah Nitz Hannah’s Website: hannahnitz.com Java with Juli: #1: Is This Thing On? Java with Juli: #407: Masturbation: The No. 1 Question You’re Asking Us! Blog: Sexual Discipleship®: What Is It, and Why Is It Important? Join the Authentic Intimacy member community! Got questions for Juli? Join her for Second Cup on September 5th!

Transcribed - Published: 4 September 2023

#480 How to Heal and Rebuild Trust and Sexual Intimacy After An Affair

Why do people cheat? And is it possible to reconcile after you or your spouse has been unfaithful? In this episode, Juli is joined by Jessica McDaniel, LPC, as they discuss the roles of disclosure, honesty, patience, and commitment in repairing a marriage that has been affected by infidelity. Infidelity hurts everyone involved, and as Jessica shares, it takes everyone working together to overcome it. Guest: Jessica McDaniel, LPC Jessica’s Instagram: @mcdanielcounseling Jessica’s Website: mcdanielcounseling.org Hope Rising Conference Affair Recovery Affair Recovery First Steps Bootcamp Affair Recovery Small Groups Java with Juli: #274: Vulnerability, Infidelity & God's Redemption Java with Juli: #364 How to Work Your Way Back to Sexual Intimacy After Infidelity Blog: How Do I Rebuild Trust After Betrayal?

Transcribed - Published: 28 August 2023

#479 More Than Just Behavior: Why Your Struggles With Sexual Sin Run Deeper Than You Think

What if your sexual desires and struggles could help you achieve deeper healing? In this episode, Juli hosts author and licensed mental health counselor Jay Stringer. Jay is deeply curious about the inner workings of our minds, and he loves to help people connect the dots between their sin struggles, the challenges they face, and the places they need healing in their hearts. Join Juli and Jay as they discuss how research helps us make sense of our sin and equips us to free ourselves from unwanted desires and outcomes. Contribute to Jay's Pioneering Research Jay is now exploring the far-reaching, deep-seated topic of human desire. He needs your help to find some answers. The Holistic Desire Survey is anonymous and your honest responses will contribute to the healing of so many individuals and couples who are facing desire problems. There are two versions of the survey: A survey for individuals and one for couples. To take the individual survey, click here, and if you'd like to participate in the couple's survey, click here to email the research team and recieve your personal link to the survey. Please complete the survey by August 31st 2023. Guest: Jay Stringer, LMHC Jay’s Website: jay-stringer.com/ Jay’s Instagram: @jay_stringer_ Website: The Holistic Desire Survey Java with Juli: #275: Finding Freedom from Unwanted Desires Java with Juli: #211 Understanding Pornography Addiction Java with Juli: #452 Porn Addiction in Marriage: How to Let God Redeem Your Story Q&A: Is there any hope for me in my struggle with porn? Q&A: How do I get past the shame of sexual sin?

Transcribed - Published: 21 August 2023

#478 How to Love and Lead Your Adult Kids with Jim Burns

How do you parent your adult children well after they've left the nest? What does it look like to hold steadfast to your beliefs while loving an adult child who has chosen to live differently? And are your children's choices your fault? These are some of the questions Juli asks in today's interview with guest Jim Burns, a well-known teacher in the field of marriage and family, and the president of the organization HomeWord. Jim shares from both his experience and his expertise, and has a lot of encouraging advice to share. Guest: Dr. Jim Burns Jim’s Instagram: @drjimburns Jim’s Twitter: @drjimburns Jim’s website: HomeWord.com Blog: Three Things To Remember About Sexual Sin & Grace Java with Juli: #159 When Your Child Struggles With Gender Webinar: How to Love Your Prodigal Child Become an Authentic Intimacy member and get your free book!

Transcribed - Published: 14 August 2023

#477 In-Laws or Outlaws? How to Handle The Challenge of Setting Boundaries with In-Laws

Is there a difference between loving parental guidance, and overreaching parental interference? How can a couple set boundaries with their in-laws? And how can in-laws give their adult children the space they need to establish strong foundations for their marriages? While many of us are familiar with the verse about leaving and cleaving, the practicalities of doing so can be challenging when there are parents and wider family who long to provide support in an important new phase of life. Juli invites her friends, Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley, to speak about why boundaries with in-laws are important, and how they can be established with love. Guests: Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley Greg and Erin on Instagram: @focusmarriage Greg and Erin on Youtube: @focusonthefamilymarriage Greg and Erin’s Podcast: Focus on Marriage Podcast Book: Ready to Wed by Dr. Greg Smalley and Erin Smalley Java with Juli: #13 Insights on In-Laws Become an Authentic Intimacy member and get your free book!

Transcribed - Published: 7 August 2023

#476 When God Ran: How God’s Love Found a Woman Lost In Shame

Seasoned Christians know that while our perfection is in process, we still live in the tension of the weakness of our flesh and the hope of becoming fully like our Savior. What does that look and feel like when you have lengthy and ongoing struggles with your flesh? This is Julia’s story, and it’s the story she shares in this honest, insightful and hope-filled podcast episode. Julia is a part of the Authentic Intimacy team, and joins Juli to discuss sexual sin, God’s love and kindness, and the cultural challenges of singleness in the American Church. Guest: Julia Mitchell Java with Juli: #450 Breaking the Marriage Idol Java with Juli: #464 Why We Need to Remember the Dignity of Singleness Blog: A Road Map to Sexual Integrity in the Midst of Sexual Brokenness by Julia Mitchell Blog: 3 Reasons I Can Run To God With My Sexual Brokenness by Julia Mitchell Sign up for our OBS interest list!

Transcribed - Published: 31 July 2023

#475 Why Empathy, Inner Healing, and Teamwork Are at the Heart of Building Intimacy

It isn’t uncommon for a couple committed to God and committed to each other to struggle to build intimacy. While it might seem like the issues and challenges you’re facing are all external, it’s often the case that there’s internal work that needs to be done. Sean and Lanette Reed join Juli in this episode to discuss how humility, faith, and empathy, helped them bridge gaps to create true intimacy. Guests: Sean and Lanette Reed Sean and Lanette’s Instagram: @seanandlanettereed Sean and Lanette’s YouTube: Life with Sean and Lanette Sean and Lanette’s TikTok: @Seanandlanette Book: Marriage in Transition by Sean and Lanette Reed Website: seanandlanette.com Podcast: Marriage in Transition Blog: Why Is Healing So Hard? Java with Juli: #223 A Christian Counselor and a Little “Grit” Can Take You a Long Way Book: Finding the Hero in Your Husband by Dr. Juli Slattery Second Cup

Transcribed - Published: 24 July 2023

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