Your 'Type' Is Keeping You Single | Matt Monday
Love Life With Matthew Hussey
Matthew Hussey
4.7 • 3.1K Ratings
🗓️ 16 March 2026
⏱️ 13 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Unfortunately, a lot of people are actually really bad at predicting what will make them happy long term.
When it comes to dating, many people get stuck on a rigid “type” which is usually a checklist of traits they think their partner must have. But interestingly, research shows that while most people have a long list of qualities they want, they often end up perfectly happy with someone who only matches a few of them.
So how do you figure out what will actually make you happy in a relationship?
And how do you evaluate that when dating apps mostly let you filter by superficial traits like height, looks, or career?
If you’ve ever wondered about this (or you know someone struggling in the dating world right now) listen to it now, and share it with a friend who's struggling in dating right now.
---
►► Watch My Free Masterclass: How To Heal From Heartbreak
8 Proven Steps to Release the Past, Rebuild Your Confidence, and Thrive in Your Next Chapter: Heartbreakplan.com
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | There's popular advice online that if you want to meet the love of your life, it helps to create the exact list of physical and emotional traits you're looking for. |
| 0:13.2 | The advice is well-meaning and of course on the surface it makes sense. |
| 0:16.2 | It helps us zero in on who might be right for us in a sea of options and helps us recognize it |
| 0:22.3 | faster when we see it on a dating app. But this advice can also hurt us and delay the process of |
| 0:28.3 | finding someone who will actually make us happy. At least, that is the thesis of a recent article |
| 0:34.5 | published in the Atlantic titled, Most People Don't Have a Type. |
| 0:39.6 | The journalist concludes, after pointing to research and speaking to experts, that many |
| 0:44.5 | daters have a list of traits they're looking for in a partner, but can be perfectly happy with |
| 0:49.6 | someone who has few of them. As a coach who has worked with hundreds of thousands of people over the last two decades, |
| 0:55.6 | I have seen this myself. The traits that people thought would bring them happiness in a relationship |
| 1:00.5 | actually didn't end up mattering at all. Now you might be hearing this and thinking, but if I don't |
| 1:06.3 | hone in on a type or a list of qualities, I risk swiping right on everyone on the apps. I can't narrow |
| 1:13.5 | down thousands of options if I'm thinking every single option could be the one for me. Or maybe |
| 1:19.3 | you're someone who likes structure and planning and the thought of winging it when it comes to |
| 1:23.4 | your dating life gives you anxiety. In this video, I will show you how to stay selective |
| 1:28.7 | without letting a rigid type quietly sabotage your love life. If you're still with me, hit |
| 1:35.3 | subscribe and like on this video and let's get started. So one of the lines in this article is |
| 1:41.2 | when people peruse dating profiles, they're often looking for someone who has |
| 1:45.9 | specific interests, qualities or hobbies. The article continues, but according to a growing |
| 1:52.0 | body of relationship research, many people end up marrying someone with few of their must-haves |
| 1:57.0 | and a lot of haves they didn't think they desired. |
| 2:01.6 | I think that it's a sign of healthy growth if our list of must haves goes down as we age. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Matthew Hussey, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Matthew Hussey and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.