Hey, the bird show.

He was a filthy peasant with magic hands, hypnotized royalty,

wouldn't die no matter how many times they tried,

and somehow became the most powerful man in Russia.

And after he finally died,

the only thing he left behind was something in a jar you are not ready for.

This is the absolutely unhinged story of Rasputin.

Hear ye, hear ye!

Come forth, all Instagram betties and crypto bros

for the most salacious gossip in the whole village.

Abby's done the work to bring you the old gossip.

Ah, Rasputin.

The man who looked like a haunted scarecrow

smelled like soup left in a hot car

and somehow had the entire Russian royal family

in a chokehold.

This man was the equivalent

of a guy you matched with on Hinge

who just lists entrepreneur on their profile.

You know he's unemployed, but he's really good at hiding it.

He wasn't a doctor.

He wasn't a priest, but he could heal with the quote-unquote power of prayer and magnetic hands,

...