Wise Effort: What Your Regrets Reveal About What Matters Most | Diana Hill

The One You Feed | Personal Growth, Emotional Resilience & Purpose

Eric Zimmer, The One You Feed

Religion & Spirituality, Self-improvement, Education, Buddhism, Mental Health, Health & Fitness

4.5 • 2.7K Ratings

🗓️ 9 June 2026

⏱️ 62 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In this episode, Diana Hill explores the concept of Wise Effort and how our regrets can become powerful guides to what matters most. Drawing from psychology, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and Buddhist wisdom, she explains why the things that hurt most often point directly toward our deepest values. Diana also discusses how to work with regret without getting stuck in it, why discomfort can be a doorway to meaningful action, and how to focus your precious energy on what is truly worth your time and attention. Along the way, she explores psychological flexibility, the wisdom found in paradox, and practical ways to align your daily actions with the life you most want to live. Have you ever ended the day feeling like your choices didn’t quite match the person you wanted to be? Maybe you slipped into autopilot, or self-doubt made it harder to stick to your goals. If so, The Six Saboteurs of Self-Control can help you recognize the hidden patterns that quietly derail your progress and offers simple, effective strategies to move past them. If you’re ready to take back control and make meaningful, lasting change, download your free copy at oneyoufeed.net/ebook. Exciting News!!! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠How a Little Becomes a Lot: The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life is out NOW! Order today!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Key Takeaways: What "Wise Effort" means and how to focus your precious energy on what matters most How regret can reveal your deepest values and point you toward meaningful action Why the things that hurt most are often clues to what you care about most The difference between toxic regret that keeps you stuck and healthy regret that helps you grow How to turn toward difficult emotions instead of avoiding them—and why it changes everything The connection between psychological flexibility, resilience, and living a values-driven life Practical ways to work with worry, grief, loneliness, and other uncomfortable emotions The role of wisdom, mindfulness, and self-awareness in making better decisions Why paradox is an essential part of growth, meaning, and a well-lived life Simple practices for accessing your own wisdom and taking the next wise step forward For full show notes:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ If you enjoyed this conversation with Dr. Diana Hill, check out these other episodes: How to Lose Regret and Choose Fulfillment with Marshall Goldsmith How To Build Mental Strength, Cope with Stress, and Thrive Under Pressure with Amy Morin By purchasing products and/or services from our sponsors, you are helping to support The One You Feed, and we greatly appreciate it. Thank you! This episode is sponsored by: ⁠⁠⁠⁠Brodo Broth⁠⁠⁠⁠: Shop the best broth on the planet with Brodo. Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠Brodo.com/TOYF⁠⁠⁠⁠ for 20% off your first subscription order and use code TOYF for an additional $10 off. ⁠⁠⁠Quince:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Refresh your wardrobe with Quince by going to ⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/feed⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. ⁠Shopify⁠ – The commerce platform that helps you build, grow, and manage your business all in one place. Start your $1/month trial at ⁠shopify.com/feed.⁠ ⁠David Protein⁠ bars deliver up to 28g of protein for just 150 calories—without sacrificing taste! For a limited time, our listeners can receive this special deal: buy 4 cartons and get the 5th free when you go to ⁠www.davidprotein.com/FEED⁠ Alma has a directory of 20,000 therapists with different specialities, life experiences, and identities, and 99% of them take insurance. Visit helloalma.com to learn more! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Aura Frames⁠⁠⁠: Named #1 by Wirecutter, you can save on the gifts moms love by visiting AuraFrames.com. For a limited time, listeners can get 25 dollars off their best-selling Carver Mat frame with code FEED. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout! ⁠⁠⁠Rocket Money⁠⁠⁠ Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at ⁠⁠⁠rocketmoney.com/feed⁠⁠⁠. ⁠⁠⁠Taskrabbit:⁠⁠⁠ When life happens, your to-do list grows. Get ahead of it now and get fifteen dollars off your first task at ⁠⁠⁠Taskrabbit.com⁠⁠⁠ or on the Taskrabbit app using promo code FEED. Taskers book up fast, especially for same-day tasks, so book trusted home help today. ⁠⁠⁠Hello Fresh⁠⁠⁠ – Get 10 free meals + a FREE Zwilling Knife (a $144.99 value) on your third box. Offer valid while supplies last. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	There's not just one truth that we're all trying to figure out, right?
0:03.6	There are many.
0:04.9	And what I really believe is we are both individuals and we are collective.
0:09.3	It's a both and paradox.
0:11.0	And we both have our genius, but we also aren't all that special.
0:19.0	Welcome to the one you feed.
0:25.2	Throughout time, great thinkers have recognized the importance of the thoughts we have.
0:29.7	Quotes like, garbage in, garbage out, or you are what you think, ring true.
0:35.2	And yet, for many of us, our thoughts don't strengthen or empower us.
0:39.5	We tend toward negativity, self-pity, jealousy, or fear.
0:44.2	We see what we don't have instead of what we do.
0:47.2	We think things that hold us back and dampen our spirit.
0:50.6	But it's not just about thinking.
0:52.6	Our actions matter.
0:53.7	It takes conscious, consistent, and creative effort to make a life worth living. But it's not just about thinking. Our actions matter.
0:58.2	It takes conscious, consistent, and creative effort to make a life worth living.
1:05.2	This podcast is about how other people keep themselves moving in the right direction, how they feed their good wolf.
1:15.4	My mom passed a few weeks ago, and when Diana Hill asked me in this conversation to name a regret, one came up immediately.
1:21.6	I didn't take my mom back to Sioda Downs, the harness racing track near Columbus where she grew up.
1:25.5	When Chris and I started going a few years ago, she told me she'd love to go.
1:28.9	It would have cost me in an afternoon. I never did it.
1:35.3	Diana calls this a kindness regret, and she has a sharp way of using it. The ache of a regret tells you what you value. If we stay with that a moment longer, instead of running away from it,
	...

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