Why You Should NEVER Go Through Your Partners Phone!! Plus, Nickname Game, Butt Plugs and Smut Books!
The Therapy Crouch
Therapy Crouch
4.7 • 3.7K Ratings
🗓️ 17 February 2026
⏱️ 35 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
On today’s episode of The Therapy Crouch, things spiral almost immediately as Abbey and Peter dive into everything from our newly launched BONK BEAT BOOK CLUB chaos to one of the most unfiltered birthday calls we’ve ever heard.
Peter shares a listener confession that had him panicking when his wife called his bluff and asked to go through his phone…
We also hear the return of The Nickname Game, featuring some truly outrageous submissions including ‘Thrush’, ‘Harpic’ and the now infamous ‘Butt Plug’ — before Abbey calls her dad live on air for his birthday… and he absolutely steals the show.
In the Agony Abs, we hear from a listener who fears he’s about to lose another relationship because he struggles to show affection — sparking an honest and surprisingly emotional conversation about how men are raised to express (or suppress) their feelings.
If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit
00:00 Introduction & The Jumper Debate
03:35 The AirPods Gym Disaster
06:00 Wife Goes Through His Phone
07:20 “I Messaged Peter Crouch…”
11:50 The Nickname Game Returns
15:15 Abbey Calls Her Dad Live
16:45 “He’s Called Butt Plug”
19:30 The Wildest Nicknames Ever
24:30 Smutty Book Club Escalates
27:30 “I Can’t Express My Emotions”
29:10 Relationship Advice & Upbringing
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I've got the ick. |
| 0:01.0 | She went through my Instagram inbox and seen I'd message Peter Crouch. |
| 0:05.0 | A happy birthday. |
| 0:06.0 | Should we try and call me dad actually? It's his birthday. |
| 0:09.0 | Oh, he's calling back now. |
| 0:10.0 | Hey Dad! |
| 0:11.0 | Have you got any mates with any good nicknames? |
| 0:14.0 | It's bum plug? |
| 0:15.0 | Why is he called bum plug? |
| 0:16.0 | Because he's a sex liar. |
| 0:18.0 | Every baby comes off with him seems to have a bump, |
| 0:21.6 | I go go up a... |
| 0:22.3 | So, guys, if you're enjoying the pod, |
| 0:28.8 | please hit that subscribe button now |
| 0:30.2 | because it really, really helps us. |
| 0:35.7 | Hello, and welcome to the therapy crouch with me, Abby Clancy. Me, Peter Crouch. Hey, guys. Hi, Ross. What is that jumper, Ross? I like this jumper. I think it's cool. It's a bit of a lounge way of jumper that I did think. That one I put it on this morning. Is it for law? No, it's not. No, it's normal. Did you buy that? Someone bought it for me. Oh, yeah. Who? |
| 1:12.0 | Yeah, does it matter? We've got matching jumpers, let's put it that way. Have you and Anna got the same jumper? His is cream. Where's my hand's blue there, here's cream. It's nice, I think. Didn't you like it? Yeah, it's... It's East London, baby. Oh. bouncing around Beffinle Green looking like a big bio, aren't I? |
| 1:10.8 | What are your comments on it be? Yeah, it's... It's East London, baby. Oh. Bouncing around Beffield green looking like a big boyo, aren't I? |
| 1:29.8 | What are your comments on it be? I think it's a bit of a statement piece. Yeah. Okay, I'm taking a loop warm from that. Noted. Okay, it'll stay in the house from now on. It's not a Maldvi-co-sheik, sorry. Oh, you're fuckers. |
| 2:35.1 | Oh, sorry. Oh, are you, you fuckers? Peter Good to have you back, actually. I know how you're feeling now? Feel all right now. Yeah? So much better, yeah, thank you. Is the peace in the household? I heard there was a vomiting bug going around. Yeah, I locked myself away. But, yeah, I was in a bad way. Yeah. To be fair. You know, so I apologise for not being around, guys. It's all right. We managed absolutely fine without. Exactly. Well, I hope it doesn't catch on. Yeah. You're on notice. No, you were missed, and I'm sure the fans will miss you, but me and Ross had a We did that with a laugh actually Didn't we? Yeah. I enjoyed that. Well, at least, you know, there is still only two chins in the room. Even though I'm here. There's only two chins in the room Even though I'm back. We didn't miss seeing this. We actually said that. We said that. Anything that anything else I annoy you on this podcast no no no no no okay great should get to the weekly round have you got any weekend have you got any weekend I've got none for you it's all this week you've been so good I like that that's true. I haven't got anything. Okay. |
| 2:35.7 | Let's move on. |
| 2:37.0 | Oh my God. |
... |
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