Welcome to Betrayal Trauma Recovery, this is Anne. I wanted to do an update on how my own personal recovery is doing.

I mentioned on a previous podcast that I'm sort of in my angry stage and it's yeah like I was not

angry for a long time I was just super sad and now I'm very angry and it's mostly

being triggered by my children which I feel terrible about so my

children are immature because they're five years old and eight years old and three years

old and they are children for example I'll say to my son you need to do this and he'll

kind of ignore me and walk around and not do it and I'll say you need to do this and he ignores

me and then I'll say you really need to do this and he'll say what well you

didn't tell me this before and I know he's lying right I know he heard me and that

really triggers the same types of things that happened with my ex.

This feeling of I'm saying something but it's not registering.

He's not hearing me. He's not taking me seriously. So last night I was talking to a friend and she said, you know, that's very common with all children. He's not acting like an addict. And I said, actually that's not true because

addicts act like eight-year-olds. That's what they do. They're immature, so they act like a five-year-old. So basically I am face-to-face with the same types of behaviors at my addict spouse,

except for in a three-year-old and a five-year-old and an eight-year-old that's appropriate

for their age is right it's age-appropriate they're learning how to tell the truth

they're learning how to listen they're learning how to interact with people

totally appropriate for a five-year-old.

Not appropriate for a 50-year-old man.

Not at all.

So I'm seeing that these immature age-appropriate behaviors from my very young children are triggering the trauma of the exact same behaviors from my immature addict lying ex-husband who is almost 40 years old.

That keeps coming up for me before Before in my parenting I've been relatively a patient, kind,

understanding mother. So this is a whole new place for me and I am working with a coach weekly right now taking a six week break while I work

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