Who Feels Like Rest?
Black Girl Burnout
Kelley Bonner
4.7 • 762 Ratings
🗓️ 14 March 2025
⏱️ 17 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this episode of the Black Girl Burnout podcast, host Kelley Bonner discusses the importance of evaluating relationships based on how they make you feel — whether they bring rest and nourishment or leave you feeling drained and exhausted. The episode encourages listeners to set boundaries, adjust dynamics, and even eliminate toxic relationships in order to cultivate connections that provide ease, joy, and mutual support. More, more, and still more is within your reach in 2025. Tune in today and prepare yourself to engage in realistic strategies that can help you with opting into a life filled with abundance and joy.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to a Black Girl Burnout podcast, Kelly here. |
| 0:13.4 | And today we are closing out the week by asking the question, who feels like rest? |
| 0:19.8 | The truth is, not all relationships are going to be |
| 0:21.8 | created equal, and some people nourish and restore us and others are going to leave us |
| 0:26.3 | feeling drained and exhausted. This episode is all about recognizing who in your life feels like |
| 0:31.8 | rest and who feels like work, so you can make some more intentional choices about where you invest your time and energy. |
| 0:40.6 | Now, in the last episode, I talked about setting boundaries with ease and how boundary work |
| 0:45.7 | shouldn't be that hard, especially after you get over the nerves of doing it. |
| 0:49.4 | And yet, I'm sure some of you were thinking, yeah, but I said boundaries regularly and people |
| 0:57.0 | don't respect them. And I find the work extremely, extremely difficult. If that is you, |
| 1:04.9 | maybe it's time to think about not that your boundaries are poor or that you're doing something wrong, but that the people you |
| 1:12.8 | have in your life may be the type of folks who are going to always undermine a boundary. |
| 1:19.5 | And it may be time to consider looking for people who feel like rest. |
| 1:26.6 | I want to feel at home. And I know so many of us as black women, |
| 1:30.9 | that feels aspirational. Like, okay, girl, that's a great dream. And I'll be honest and vulnerable |
| 1:37.6 | with you. I don't know that I found every relationship in my life feels like home, but a few of them do. And I'm desperately trying to make |
| 1:47.8 | sure that when I add someone to my life from here on out, that they definitely feel like rest, |
| 1:53.9 | that I find space to be myself and I find space to be soft and present and vulnerable and happy and joyful and have somebody who loves my joy |
| 2:05.3 | as much as they tolerate and help me with my pain. Remember, we are marching into rest and we are |
| 2:12.5 | looking at relationships. And so it's so important that we find out who is restorative in our lives and who is depleting. |
| 2:21.9 | And we have to unlearn this belief that relationships are always going to be that way, that draining |
| 2:29.3 | relationships are just how it is. And I cannot tell you how many people feel that way. You know, over on |
... |
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