What's Wrong with These Kids (with Keon Polee)
My Momma Told Me
Big Money Players Network and iHeartPodcasts
4.8 • 1.6K Ratings
🗓️ 13 January 2026
⏱️ 65 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Comedian Keon Polee had a conspiracy theory, but damnit we're not going to let that get in the way of a good conversation. Keon had us asking the big questions: Whose fault is it if the baby turns out subpar? How do you know if your nut is trash? Did white people ruin accents? Langston's never written a funny poem, and David is just trying to have fun with his wife. We get nostalgic for 90s stunt comedy. Bring dummies back! Plus, we take a call from a super tall caller.
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LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is an IHeart podcast. |
| 0:02.6 | Guaranteed Human. I don't know a lot of dudes who won the divorce in general. That's the thing. That's fair. I really, I really. A lot of them are angry. Yeah. Right. Even if you got your money, like you didn't, like, it's still like not, you're not looking at it. Like, oh, he's up now. Yeah. He's better without the pardon. No. |
| 0:23.7 | Damn. |
| 0:24.2 | Staying with my baby. still like not you're not looking at it like oh he's up now yeah he's better without the pardon |
| 0:22.2 | no damn staying with my baby boo yeah we talk about all time i was like oh we're never leaving |
| 0:28.6 | we'll figure it out i'm not going back out there i'm not going back out there yeah because i also |
| 0:33.3 | didn't have to come here so of course i'm not leaving no yeah i didn't have to come over here |
| 0:37.1 | yeah i made this choice too yeah please with this restaurant still. I had a great of a part. Yeah. I don't need to try nothing to it. Come on. This is delicious. Yeah. What is beer you? I don't know. I'm not. Y'all don't make that here. The government growing babies. |
| 0:58.6 | Microchips in your hands. |
| 1:01.8 | All koala bears are racist. |
| 1:04.4 | I'm all of to war. |
| 1:06.3 | The ozone layer owes the money. |
| 1:10.0 | Farshins offended turkey stuff. |
| 1:12.7 | Y'all can't tell me nothing. |
| 1:16.4 | I get so weak in the knees. |
| 1:18.6 | I can hardly speak. |
| 1:20.1 | I lose all control and something takes over me. |
| 1:23.5 | Welcome, little mamas and gentiles alike to another phenomenal episode of my mama told me got that |
| 1:28.5 | shit out come on the podcast where we died deep deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theory |
| 1:36.9 | and we don't try to prove a motherfucking thing anymore do you want us to you don't you have a lot of |
| 1:42.9 | podcasts you can listen to where you learn. If you want, the daily. Yeah. Other stuff. You got to go to about two sources. If you want some guys to talk about a movie they saw and recall it poorly. Yeah. And then be dragged in the comments. This is where you need to be. This is the exact correct space. They be coming at us about those movies. We just be saying stuff. I just say shit. It's not. We didn't rehearse this, everyone. No. So if we get it wrong, treat it like when your friend is talking. You're like, that motherfuckering wrong. But you like, move on. Yeah, it doesn't. Oh, they give you a lot of well actually? |
| 2:18.6 | Yeah. |
... |
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