What Causes an Insecure Attachment Style?

On Attachment

Stephanie Rigg

Self-improvement, Society & Culture, Education, Relationships

5 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 8 November 2022

⏱️ 21 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In this episode, we're unpacking some of the common origin stories of each insecure attachment style. We'll look at what causes anxious attachment, dismissive-avoidant attachment and disorganised/fearful avoidant attachment, with a particular focus on early childhood and family systems. Key themes discussed include inconsistency, emotional neglect, and chaotic home environments, and how each of these can shape the attachment blueprint of a child.To download my free Attachment 101 guide, click...

Transcript

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0:00.0	You're listening to On attachment, a place to learn about how attachment shapes the way we experience
0:09.9	relationships and where you'll gain the guidance, knowledge and practical tools to
0:15.0	overcome insecurity and build healthy thriving relationships.
0:18.9	I'm your host, relationship coach Stephanie Rigg, and I'm really glad you're here.
0:28.0	Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of On Attachment. In today's episode, we're going to be talking all about the
0:34.8	causes of insecure attachment. So looking at the origin stories of each of the
0:41.2	anxious attachment style, the dismissive avoidant attachment style and the fearful
0:46.0	avoidant or disorganized attachment style. I think this is such a powerful and important conversation to have because it not only contextualizes our
0:57.0	behaviors against the backdrop of where they came from, where they may have
1:01.3	originated, but it also really invites us into a whole new level of compassion, not only for ourselves but for the people around us. I think when we can see attachment behaviors,
1:14.0	particularly ones that we find challenging or difficult, as adaptations that have
1:19.7	been in place for a really long time, often since we were young children, I think we can start to have more
1:27.2	sympathy, more curiosity, more compassion for where these things have come from rather than just
1:32.1	taking them personally or being frustrated with ourselves
1:34.5	or being stuck. So I'm hoping that today's episode will really offer that insight to you so that you can understand yourself and those around you a little better.
1:45.3	Before we dive into that I just wanted to let you know that I have a free guide attachment
1:52.1	101 which you can download in the show notes. I put this
1:55.2	together it really gives you an overview of each attachment style, some of these
1:59.1	origin stories that we're going to talk about today and where each attachment style can struggle
2:04.3	and how it can show up in adult relationships.
2:06.7	So that's a totally free guide.
2:08.3	You can download that in the show notes and I'd love to hear from you if you find that helpful.
	...

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