We’re Not Just Raising Boys - We’re Shaping Men: 10 Actions to Start Today
After Bedtime with Big Little Feelings
Dear Media and Big Little Feelings
4.5 • 5.8K Ratings
🗓️ 4 March 2026
⏱️ 40 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
If you’re raising a boy, this episode will light a fire in you - in the best, most empowering way. Because here’s the truth: The kind of men our boys become is not random - it’s not just personality, or fate. It’s shaped - day by day - in childhood. In how we respond to their anger, their tears, their mistakes.
Parents are not just witnessing who their sons become; we are actively building the men they will be - through parenting. And the most hopeful part? There are concrete, science-backed things you can start doing today that measurably shift your child’s emotional trajectory - and the kind of partner, friend, and human he will one day be.
In this bold, honest, sometimes funny-so-you-don’t-cry episode, Deena goes straight at the stuff that feels big and scary to say out loud: male entitlement, emotional shutdown, aggression, consent failures, unequal partnership, and why “boys will be boys” has quietly lowered the bar for generations. Then, she flips the script - with science, real stories, and concrete parenting tools you can start literally today - so you walk away knowing exactly how to raise a boy who feels deeply, respects boundaries, takes accountability, and is safe to love.
Here are the 10 daily actions that turn little boys into great men - starting TODAY:
• Why emotional skills in men are built - or blocked - in early childhood
• The critical difference between allowing anger vs. allowing harm
• How to teach consent and bodily autonomy starting in toddlerhood
• Why boys receive less emotional coaching (and how to change that)
• Rough play, wrestling, and what it’s actually doing in the brain
• Teaching boys about periods, care work, and partnership early
• How to build empathy and perspective-taking in daily moments
• Accountability and repair: the skill many men never learned
• Why punishment and shame backfire - especially for boys
• The core message boys need about love, power, and safety
You’ll leave this episode feeling seen in the weight of raising boys today, and radically empowered in how much influence you actually have. Because you’re not just raising a child; you’re shaping the kind of man the world will one day meet. And once you hear this, you’ll parent your son differently tomorrow morning.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | The following podcast is a dear media production. |
| 0:05.2 | Okay, besties. Today, it's me, Dina. |
| 0:08.3 | Kristen actually has a killer migraine and she is like throwing up at home, to be honest. |
| 0:13.1 | So she is out for the count friends and I'm so excited to spend time with you. |
| 0:18.6 | I just came fresh off of mom duty. I made a meatloaf for dinner, |
| 0:22.7 | which by the way, like, meatloaf is so good. I forgot about it for, I think, a few years. And then |
| 0:28.0 | randomly, I was like, wait a minute. I used to love this. And I made one. Like, holy shit. So good. |
| 0:34.2 | In case you forgot, definitely make a meatloaf soon, which I think we need a better word for it, |
| 0:39.3 | because that sounds really gross. Secondly, I was just watching a little bit of Love is Blind to |
| 0:45.0 | unwind a little bit from my day. And, oh my God, related to today's topic, those men, those men are why |
| 0:53.0 | we're having this conversation today. |
| 0:55.6 | But as I was watching this episode, they were doing some laundry. |
| 0:58.7 | And Emma was like, oh, you sort your colors, right, to do your laundry. |
| 1:03.5 | And he was like, of course I do. |
| 1:05.1 | And then they both concluded that only serial killers don't sort colors for laundry. |
| 1:10.6 | And I had a moment. I had a moment where I was like, |
| 1:13.8 | oh, no, that's me. I know. I'm really specific about so many things in life. Like, I am the person |
| 1:21.4 | who when my husband loads the dishwasher, I will literally go reload the entire thing so that it |
| 1:26.6 | is just perfect and uses all the space |
| 1:28.9 | as effectively as possible. But shockingly, I don't store colors for laundry. And I pretty much |
| 1:35.3 | never have. I used to at one point. And then you know what I realized? Nothing bad happens. I have |
| 1:41.4 | literally never once had colors run into the others or clothes get ruined. I feel like |
... |
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