We're Being Replaced! (For The Summer) | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

2 Bears 1 Cave

Society & Culture, Comedy

4.8 • 23.2K Ratings

🗓️ 7 July 2025

⏱️ 72 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

SPONSORS: - Order on DoorDash and save big during Summer of DashPass. Sign up today! DashPass benefits apply only to eligible orders. Terms apply. - Sponsored by BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/bears - Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://BlueChew.com! And we’ve got a special deal for our listeners: Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code BEARS -- just pay $5 shipping. - If your revenues are at least in the seven figures, download the free e-book “Navigating Global Trade: 3 Insights for Leaders” at https://NetSuite.com/BEARS - Get a 60-day free trial at https://www.shipstation.com/cave Thanks to ShipStation for sponsoring the show! This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer reunite in sunny California for a jam-packed episode full of FOMO, fatherhood, and flaming hot air balloon disasters. The bears talk about Tom’s California vacation and getting into surfing with his boys. They dig into wild parenting comparisons, Luis J. Gomez’s insane training routines, and Bert feeling FOMO for Andrew Schulz’s perfect summer life on Instagram. Tom then drops major news about shooting a new Netflix movie called El Tigre, which leads to Bert sharing his own plans for filming the series Free Bert in Atlanta. With both Bears tied up all summer, they announce special "Summer Bears" episodes and name the two hosts Chris Distefano and Stavros Halkias. Things get political (kind of) as Bert and Tom debate who should talk about world issues—spoiler alert: it’s not them. Bert then rants about the sheer terror of hot air balloons and Tom tells another legendary Top Dog tale about how he diverted a plane so he could take a piss. Buckle up—it’s a bumpy (and hilarious) ride. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 296 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:40 - Father FOMO 00:05:07 - The Summer Bears 00:16:45 - FaceTiming Chrissy D 00:20:16 - The Middle Class Of Comedy 00:33:09 - Bert Explains Global Politics 00:39:48 - Hot Air Balloons Are Sketch 00:49:29 - Crazy Plane Stories 01:00:17 - Helicopters 01:06:45 - Uber Driver Smackdown Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	100%
0:01.2	Summer bears
0:06.3	Summer bears are here
0:08.9	We like to get queer
0:11.0	The summer bears
0:12.4	What song is that?
0:14.1	It's summer bears
0:15.1	It's summer guys
0:17.4	It's summertime
0:17.9	Tommy is back in his home state
0:20.3	Living here full time.
0:21.9	He left Texas.
0:23.5	The boys are going to be raised soft pronouns.
0:27.1	Shit like that.
0:28.0	Yeah.
0:28.5	Your boys are going to see Rogan's girls and they're going to be more manly than your boys.
0:31.9	I love that you're back here and you just left Texas and you don't live there at all.
0:35.0	Thanks, man.
0:35.6	I appreciate it.
0:36.3	It's a warm welcome back. I like my summer retire. How great is it? Waking up, surfing with the boys.
0:42.2	That was awesome today. Does push go out? She did not go out with us. She met us there,
0:46.9	but she was doing something. So she met us there. But it was really fun to uh the little dudes dude little dudes don't struggle to pop up on a board at all
	...

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