This is a HeadGum podcast.

Ah, there you are a traveler.

Come inside, hang up your coat, put your feet by the fire, and I shall

bring you what you so desperately seek.

Rood Tales of Magic.

Ah, welcome back to rude tales of magic. It's been two years since the events of two years ago, but for our heroes it's only been two days of floating up that Lazy Kay River.

It's early dawn now.

They're deep into a part of the world known as Cordelia Pastoral, a gentle place where the farmlands roll off into the horizon.

Small towns dot the landscape and rhubarb pies are left out to cool on windowcills.

Yes, even the river itself flows more slowly in this part of the world.

Giant willow trees sweep out over the riverbanks and cattails sway lazily in the breeze as the humid air pushes them around,

but it's not without its dangers. Twice now you've floated past rivers

with visible callstones in the distance. They always

look the same. Large stones with your faces on them that look to have recently

emerged from the earth. Were it not for the cover of twilight, or perhaps the Spanish moss, you might have been detected.

Your closest call came at a crossroad when you saw an upright deer standing among some callstones that had emerged recently uprooting a sign.

He looked at you, looked at the callstones, looked back at you, back at the callstones, back at you back at the callstones back at you and in common said

fuck the police before running up a tree.

Hey Hey, uh, Sterve? Yeah, yes, yes, feeling. Were you able... Did you hold on to any of those tea bones? I did know. I'd be they were all prepared for the meal.

Yeah. Oh I forgot to grab any of those vegetables. And speaking of grabbing

Albie your foot your hooves you don't have feet you have hooves one, your hooves. You don't have feet, you have hooves.

One of your hooves, you feel something very cold and very slimy move around it.

...