We were almost not a thing. For so many reasons. Which one are you referring to? I'm referring to the fact you sampled the boy pond before you... I sampled the boy... Can I not say that I dated... I don't want to sample any ponds. The man puddle. The man puddle? I'm making it sound like fragrance sticks at an airport or something. And we could have been Dan and Pete. Well, it wouldn't have been you, Phil. There would have been no we. No. That's the point. You would have been Dan and Pete. I think that Dan and Phil moved too fast. Oh. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. Oh, no, it is because I said two. I said it. Too fast. We just moved fast.

Yeah, we did move fast.

I would say, well, here's the thing.

I hung out with a few guys...

Hung out with.

Prior to meeting Phil for the first time.

And it's not that you were so amazing you blew them out the water.

I mean, you are.

But I'm saying there was more that every single one of them had a bizarre red flag. Okay. So what were the red flags? Because you know that I met that one guy that all he talked about was trains the entire night. And don't get me wrong, I love a hyper fixation. Don't get Dan going on roller coasters. But... It was trains and Sport Guy. You know the meme of the guy shouting into his girlfriend's ear?

That was like me in an actual corner of a club as this guy just talked to me about London Tube models. I'm just surprised you went to the club and talked about trains. Who does that? I know. And then I told someone and it was like, nah, He took you to the club and sat in the corner

and talked to you about trains, does he?

Does he? Does that with everyone?

Oh.

And then the second guy, which we both knew,

I feel like, was closer to snatching the Dan from Phil. But he also had a red flag, which was

almost the complete opposite of aggressive, very straight acting train guy. Yes. He kept singing

show tunes and talking in the third person.

Oh, the third person. Phil, I'm so scared that you're gonna fall from the names person.

Let me say a different name. Gordon likes that. Gorgian! As if I'd have caught on a drink with someone called...

Okay, no offense. Shout out to all the sexy Gordon's out there. Gordon's a gruff name.

Yeah, Gordon. Gordon, these nuts. Timmy's confused. Yeah, and I love a show tune. Don't get me wrong. Leon Phil, love musical theatre. But not every day. I think he yearned to be on the stage, but kept doing it as you were walking through town. Felt very perceived. Making life a musical. And they kept being like, it's not very Gordon to order one of those. And look, camp, right? Carta camp. Like high concept character. Yes. But I felt like I was in a piece of performance art. I get it. And then I met up with you and you said, hey, do you want to buy a pizza from Tesco and burn it in the oven?

Perfect.

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