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The Bert Show

Vault: What's it like dating celebrities?

The Bert Show

The Bert Show

News, Society & Culture, Entertainment News, Comedy

4.14.4K Ratings

🗓️ 16 July 2026

⏱️ 10 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Vault: What's it like dating celebrities?

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, the bird show.

0:01.7

If you have dated a celebrity in the past, we want to put you on the voice disguiser

0:06.9

to see if like the fantasy of dating a celebrity is, you know, really what you thought it would

0:15.3

be initially because Wendy here's got a couple of friends that locally are celebrity obsessed,

0:20.6

want to date celebrities.

0:22.7

And my thought on the whole thing is as soon as you get past the shine and as soon as you get

0:26.6

past the bragging rights of dating a celebrity, I wonder if at the end of the day you're still

0:31.7

having the same damn problems as non-celebrities. So is it what it's cracked up to be?

0:36.4

404-741Q100. And I would think even more so.

0:39.6

I mean, they're normal people. Like, celebrities are people. They're not just out in the spotlight

0:44.6

for nothing. But yeah, my friends are just obsessed with wanting to date them. They think it's

0:48.9

glamorous. They'll wait around for guys on purpose just to hang out with them just once and wait for hours and go to

0:55.6

specific places, which I don't understand. I mean, it's a normal person. You know, you wouldn't

1:00.1

do that with a normal guy. If any guy, you would not do that. And I get the luster of the whole

1:05.2

thing, man, it's going to be limos. It's going to be backstage access. I'm going to be on the set

1:10.8

and I'm going to see other big time celebrities. But I still think relationship-wise, at the end of the day, it's still a relationship between a man and a woman. Yeah, well, I said earlier, I said, yeah, celebrities I wouldn't want a relationship with. I would want a one-night stand. I want the bragging rights saying I sleep yeah I want to sleep yeah absolutely I don't know

1:29.0

if I'd use the term I hit that but yeah I would definitely brag about sleeping with a celebrity but I yeah

1:35.1

I have no interest which one Melissa come on top of your list you already you throw around Don

1:39.2

Johnson like mad that was my first guess. Your Hope Island list.

1:44.6

Lord, I mean, that's...

1:46.3

Just give me a second and let me narrow it down to five people.

1:49.3

Come on.

...

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