Vault: The Worst Sex Related Injuries
The Bert Show
The Bert Show
4.1 • 4.4K Ratings
🗓️ 17 November 2025
⏱️ 13 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | You're on The Virtue. So I recently had an SRI. That would be a sex-related injury. This isn't the first. Yeah, this is your second one that we know of. That you know of. I think the last one was some sort of knee injury or whatever. I can't really get into it too far, but this one is going to make y'all grab yourselves, okay? |
| 0:21.4 | Are you ready for this one? |
| 0:22.3 | No, don't do this. |
| 0:23.3 | Come on. |
| 0:23.9 | Are you ready for this one? Don't. I'm not going to tell you, because I'm married and nobody wants to hear about married people's sex. I mean, it's just not hot. You know, if you're single and talking about it, it's a different story than I think when you're married and talking about it. |
| 0:34.6 | So I'm married. |
| 0:35.5 | I've been married for three years, over three years. |
| 0:37.8 | We're doing fine in all that department. |
| 0:39.6 | We're still really having a good time together, but nobody wants to hear about that. Well, I want to play a round of SRI poker then. Okay. So you will dole out the first hand of your sexually, um, sex-related injury. SRI. SRI. SRI. And then others will have to call up and top this story. |
| 0:56.9 | Okay. |
| 0:57.2 | Now, none of us and top this story. |
| 0:56.9 | Okay. |
| 0:57.2 | None of us have heard this story, so we have no idea what our first hand of poker is going to be. |
| 1:02.9 | Okay, I won't tell you how it happened, but I had a nipple rip. |
| 1:09.3 | Oh! |
| 1:09.8 | Oh! |
| 1:13.0 | Oh, no! |
| 1:14.8 | No! |
| 1:17.4 | Those clams from Love Shack are... No! |
| 1:18.2 | It had nothing to do with anything outside of passion, but I'm telling you, I didn't even notice it when it happened. |
| 1:24.8 | Come on. |
| 1:25.1 | I noticed it in the shower afterwards when the water was |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from The Bert Show, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of The Bert Show and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.