Vault: Bert Is Taking a Break From Alcohol
The Bert Show
The Bert Show
4.1 • 4.4K Ratings
🗓️ 21 May 2026
⏱️ 13 minutes
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| 0:00.0 | The Bird Show. So late October, I went to Nashville for the Georgia game, for the Georgia Vandy game, and just really did it up, alcohol-wise, with Mark. Really did it up, I mean, in an ugly way. And the weekend after that, we had some friends in town from Pennsylvania, did it up again on Friday night. Then we had Jackie Lantern on Saturday night, and I got stupid again. The Big Wicked? Big Wicked, yeah, on Saturday night. Then we had Jack you lantern on Saturday night. I got stupid again. The Big Wicked? |
| 0:21.6 | Big Wicked, yeah, on Saturday night. |
| 0:23.6 | The Big Wicked stories were funny because for about two, three weeks after Big Wicked, |
| 0:28.6 | people would come into the studio, like either salespeople or other people, you know, |
| 0:35.6 | management or just people coming in like guests on the show. |
| 0:39.1 | And everyone would say, oh, dude, I saw you. |
| 0:42.2 | Big Wicked, man. |
| 0:42.9 | You look like you're having a good time |
| 0:43.9 | and you could see the vacant look in Bert's eyes |
| 0:46.4 | where he's like, when did I see you? |
| 0:49.6 | And even one of them was like, we rode there together. |
| 0:53.9 | At one point of the night, and I'm not bragging about this, I'm embarrassed by it. But at one point of the night, we had a whole bunch of people in the limo, and the limo had to stop because I thought I was going to throw up. It's right in front of like the varsity. So they stop the limo, I get out, take some breaths, do that whole self-talk thing. You can do this. |
| 1:11.7 | You don't have to throw up. |
| 1:12.5 | You're going to be okay. |
| 1:14.9 | Oh, that's not a good place to be. And I didn't yak, and I got back in the limo, but I was embarrassed, and I felt like an idiot. You just get to an age, you know, I feel like, and I got kids now. And even though the party's always in me, |
| 1:24.5 | I just don't want to be that guy. |
| 1:26.1 | And I haven't wanted to be with him for a while, right? |
| 1:28.9 | So I thought, all right, I'm taking November off from drinking. So I did for like three and a half weeks. And the target date really was Thanksgiving because I knew once I got around Stacey's family that the alcohol was going to be flowing. But I talked from like the first all the way to November 25th off. And I was around Bird on two |
| 1:45.4 | occasions. |
| 1:46.5 | One, |
| 1:47.0 | we ended up, |
| 1:48.0 | uh, But I talked from like the first all the way to November 25th off. |
... |
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