Valentine's Day Sucks! | Your Mom's House Ep. 695

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Tom Segura

Comedy, Relationships, Society & Culture, Tv & Film, Comedy Interviews

4.7 • 23.4K Ratings

🗓️ 15 February 2023

⏱️ 88 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

HAPPY VALENTIME’S DAY!! On this week’s episode of YMH, Tom Segura and Christina P give their best advice for surviving Valentine’ Day, Tom responds to some listeners about where he actually came on his tour, the mommies give an update on their eye mask revelation, they take a look at some tramp stamps that give Christina a run for her money, and they discuss one of Top Dog’s truest loves: t*ts. They watch a cool update video from Unk Shine, whose camera is, of course, not facing the right way, and a girl showing off some awesome farts!

Transcript

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0:00.0	There's nothing better than knowing what arouses your father.
0:02.8	You're up, Yana, never heard of that.
0:04.6	That's because you're too poor to know what that is.
0:06.6	I used the vomit as lubricant and I finished myself off.
0:09.6	Is that what you're saying?
0:10.7	She's got huge fucking pills.
0:12.4	I know, and that ain't no shit.
0:13.6	Yeah.
0:15.0	Welcome.
0:16.6	Welcome to your mom's house.
0:25.9	And it's one of the best times of the year.
0:29.7	It's Valentine's Day.
0:31.0	Valentine's Day.
0:32.0	We love it.
0:33.1	Yeah.
0:33.4	I love we love being told when to celebrate each other.
0:36.8	Manufactured holidays are always the best.
0:40.1	The commercial ones, especially ones that you are forced
0:44.0	to make a purchase and otherwise you are a bad person.
0:47.8	That's really bad.
0:48.5	Well, you're a bad, bad partner.
0:51.4	Yeah.
	...

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