Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm your guest Baylor,

Monty Belmonti from 939, the river W RSI in North Hampton, Massachusetts,

in for Jesse Thorn. This week, unreasonable scorch and leisure.

Stefan brings the case against his dad, Brian. Stefan enjoys spending time with

his family but says too much of their together time is based around pool

parties. Stefan doesn't care for swimming or laying out

and wants the family to do more indoor activities together.

Brian says pool time is a great way for the family to bond.

Who's right? Who's wrong? Only one man can decide.

Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom.

Oh yeah, bloody hell. I'm sweating in here.

Roasting, boiling, baking, sweltering, it's like a sauna

furnace and frying egg on my stomach.

Oh, who wouldn't lap this up? It's ridiculous,

tremendous, fantastic, and dabbied, dozy,

pie whole, tastic.

All right, guest Baylor, Monty Belmonti, Sway them in.

Stefan and Brian, please rise and raise your right hands.

Do you swear to shower before entering the pool?

I do. I always. No horse play, no diving, no glass containers.

I'm not quite sure about the glass containers part, but yes.

Okay, well, we'll let that one slide for now. Do you swear to abide by

...