So if you're a regular listener, maybe you've read my book, maybe you follow me on

Instagram, you might have heard about my journey as a recovering people pleaser.

It's true.

I used to struggle so much with making a decision that might upset someone else and I've been on a journey and now I really consider myself a boundary queen.

I love talking about boundaries. I love teaching parents how to set

boundaries, even how to think about boundaries in an accurate and helpful way. And today, this is exactly what we're going to do together. I'm Dr. Becky and this is good inside.

Hi Carmala, hi Dr. Becky. I am so excited to be talking with you today, and so how I would love to begin is just give me a little bit of a sense of what's on your mind. And then I also, I like to hold myself responsible for giving very kind of like actionable specific help.

So let me know what's on your mind

and let me know what you would love to end our conversation with today.

So why make sure this is useful to you?

Sure.

So my husband and I are really different kinds of parents and we

have very different relationships with boundaries. So that has created a

dynamic with our children where he's very often like the

preferred parents. I often find like that there tends to be like a lot more

tantrums when he's around, like just bigger emotions, like multiple

times throughout the day.

When I do then try to like hold boundaries, I feel like less effective after he's been around.

Sometimes he's traveling for work and I find those times to be easier sometimes. So there's this sort of imbalance that's happening and it's

resulting in just I feel like a lot of emotional like work for, which I know is like normal, but how do I navigate

co-parenting with somebody who has a much like looser relationship with boundaries than I do and how do I mitigate

like the impact that I feel is having on my relationship with my kids?

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