Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 12-5-24
Monday Morning Podcast
All Things Comedy
4.8 • 32.8K Ratings
🗓️ 5 December 2024
⏱️ 124 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Bill rambles about holiday gifting, street shootings, and 70s hair parts.
(00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast
(35:30) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 12-5-16 - Bill rambles about Nico Rosberg's retirement, cardio music, and toupee sex.
(01:26:08) - Anything Better? NFL Preview & Picks - Week 14
Mando: As a special offer for listeners, new customers get $5 off a Starter Pack with our exclusive code. That equates to over 40% off your Starter Pack Use code BURR at www.ShopMando.com
SimpliSafe: SimpliSafe is extending its massive Black Friday deal for my listeners. This week only, you can get 50% off any new system with a select professional monitoring plan. This is your last chance to claim their best offer of the year at www.SimpliSafe.com/BURR
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr. It's time for Thursday afternoon just before Friday, Monday morning podcast, and I'm just checking in. Checking in on you. What's going on? How are you? Oh my God, it's the fucking holiday season, and I haven't even shopped yet. |
| 0:25.3 | I have yet to open my computer and go on to Amazon and click on things. |
| 0:27.9 | When will I find the time? |
| 0:31.0 | Let me tell you young people something. Dude, you never would have survived Christmas shop in the 80s when I was a kid. |
| 0:38.8 | These fucking generation, whatever they are, |
| 0:42.1 | oh my God, they couldn't fucking handle the 80s. |
| 0:46.9 | Trying to go buy somebody a fucking itchy sweater |
| 0:50.1 | while fighting the urge to go to pewter pot |
| 0:52.8 | and get yourself a muffin. |
| 0:55.2 | That's what the fucking streets were like out in the suburbs with the malls. |
| 1:02.7 | That's what's wrong with this fucking country, man. |
| 1:05.2 | That's why everybody's so fucking soft is because you can do your Christmas shopping at home. |
| 1:10.5 | Do you have any idea, man? |
| 1:13.6 | Why does everybody think when they grew up was so fucking difficult? Somebody was just commenting |
| 1:18.5 | on that fucking CEO who got whacked in New York. And somebody wrote, this is Chicago. |
| 1:24.6 | New York is Chicago in the 1930s. It's like, no, it isn't. Nobody's dying of syphilis. |
| 1:30.4 | All right? And nobody goes to jail for tax evasion, unless you have no money. |
| 1:41.1 | You could never have survived Chicago in the 1930s. Plenty of pussies lived in Chicago in the 1930s. |
| 1:45.4 | Plenty of pussies lived in Chicago in the 1930s. |
| 1:48.5 | They were called accountants and they did fine. |
| 1:51.4 | Stop acting like everybody had a fucking Tommy gun and they were working for Capone. |
| 1:55.1 | They weren't. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from All Things Comedy, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of All Things Comedy and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2025.