You're listening to Comedy Central.

But as many of you know, it's the one-month anniversary, the Iran War.

And as we all know, one month is the escalated threat anniversary.

If the Strait of Hormuz is not immediately open for business, we will conclude by blowing up and completely obliterating all of their electric generating plants, oil wells, and Korg Island.

Better open that straighter. We're going to blow you up.

More than we already blew you. We're going to double blow you up.

We're going to blow you up.

That's where we are at in our war.

Trump is threatening to escalate our bombing campaign

unless Iran opens the strait that they closed

in response to Trump's bombing campaign.

I believe we've entered what General

Patton used to refer to as the human centipede portion of the war. I urge you not to look that up.

And I understand why the world would like the Strait of Hormuz open.

The conflict is disrupting global supply chains for other surprising and essential products.

Gray nuts, oil, saffron, dates, paddles, and pickleballs.

Yeah, I'm not sure how that snuck into the essential product store.

But I guess we all make sacrifices in wartime. I'm not sure. My dearest Eliza.

It's been over a month since I've played, well, not tennis, kind of like tennis.

It's more like baby tennis.

It's like, well, it's bigger than ping pong.

You really have to try it, Eliz.

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