"This Must Be My Fault" — Why We Take Rejection So Personally (Ep 201)

The Best of You

Dr. Alison Cook

Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.9 • 957 Ratings

🗓️ 26 March 2026

⏱️ 48 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What if heartbreak isn’t just about what happened to you—but what it reveals about what you believe about yourself? At its core, heartbreak isn’t just about loss. It’s about the meaning your mind and body begin to make of that loss—especially when it touches something older. Rejection, betrayal, and disappointment have a way of surfacing deeper questions about who we are… and whether we are still worthy of love. If you’ve ever found yourself asking, why does this hurt so much more than it should?… this conversation between Dr. Alison Cook and Dr. Peace Amadi will help you begin to understand why—and what healing might look like. You’ll explore: Why rejection can feel deeply personal… even when it isn’t The hidden beliefs heartbreak can quietly bring to the surface Why certain patterns in your life keep getting replayed How past wounds can shape your present reactions What happens to your faith when pain doesn’t make sense Where healing begins when nothing feels resolved yet This conversation offers a compassionate, faith-rooted path forward—helping you make sense of what’s been stirred up within you, and gently move toward a deeper sense of peace. More Resources: Check out Dr. Peace Amadi’s brand new book, The Wholehearted Way: Finding Peace After Life’s Heartbreaks, Disappointments, and Rejections Connect further with @dralisoncook on Instagram Want to go deeper? Join 80,000+ soul menders in our email community and receive weekly reflections and gentle practices here. If you liked this episode, then you’ll love: Episode 200: Trauma, Safety, and Healing—3 Trauma Responses + 4 Ways to Restore Trust Episode 179: Building Wise Trust - How to Protect Your Heart Without Closing It Off Episode 188: The Healing Power of Safe People (Not Just Safe Spaces) 📖 Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here Don't forget to browse this week's sponsors, who make it possible for me to bring you these resources for free + provide you with additional discounts! Quince - How you dress affects your mood and you can trust that Quince has you covered in every day sustainable wardrobe staples. Go to ⁠Quince.com/bestofyou⁠ for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! Cozy Earth - Cozy up in every day luxury bedding and their bamboo pajamas and physically feel your nervous system take a breath. Head to Cozyearth.com and use my code BESTOFYOU for up to 20% off. Caraway - Save even more on non-toxic cookware and get an additional 10% off your order when you visit Carawayhome.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. *Some of the links above are Amazon affiliate links. If you choose to purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Jamie Lang and Sophie Haboo have arrived on Disney Plus.
0:04.0	We're having a baby.
0:06.0	We're having a baby.
0:07.0	I've always wanted to be mom.
0:09.0	And we're bringing you on our journey through everything.
0:12.0	I have no idea what we're doing.
0:13.0	Thank you. I have more of an idea.
0:15.0	I think of it like a Tamagotchi.
0:17.0	At the end of all of this...
0:20.0	We're going to have a little baby.
0:21.6	Raising Chelsea, a Hulu original series streaming April 2nd exclusively on Disney Plus.
0:26.6	18 plus subscription required T's and T supply.
0:29.6	When you're sitting there after Harbreak, after the end of a marriage, after the loss of a hope, the loss of a dream, what are you really believing about yourself in that moment?
0:39.8	Heartbreak has a way of revealing the toughest, nastiest things
0:43.3	that we think about ourselves.
0:45.3	And until we can tap into that and confront that
0:48.3	and begin to work on changing that,
0:50.3	as soon as we become aware of things,
0:52.3	that's the only place we can start to kind of dust them off and begin to work with them.
1:01.9	Hey, everyone, and welcome back to this week's episode of The Best of You podcast. I'm so glad you're here with me
1:11.9	for today's deep dive conversation. This is for anyone who's ever known the ache of heartbreak,
1:18.5	rejection, or disappointment, and especially for those of us who know what it is to take
	...

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