This is What Confidence Looks Like

Emotional Badass

Nikki Eisenhauer

Health & Fitness, Self-improvement, Mental Health, Education

4.8 • 2.2K Ratings

🗓️ 30 November 2025

⏱️ 25 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Confidence isn't about being the loudest person in the room, it's about having faith in your own influence and ability. Using The Emotion Thesaurus as a guide, this exploration breaks down exactly what confidence looks like physically (strong posture, wide steps, relaxed muscles) and what it feels like internally (calm breathing, positive outlook, mental ease). Highly sensitive people often get their confidence knocked down by living in a world where 80-85% of people aren't wired like them, leading to constant feedback that they're "too much" or "wrong." The physical signs reveal patterns like choosing the middle seat instead of hiding in corners, steering conversations instead of shrinking back, and that interesting connection between confidence and a positive outlook. There's also the shadow side where confidence can escalate into smugness or contempt, plus suppressed confidence showing up as minimizing compliments, downplaying your own comfort to make others feel better, and changing topics to deflect spotlight. The reluctant leader phenomenon gets explored too, where HSPs have all the attributes of wonderful leaders but stay sheepish about stepping up, then risk becoming complainers when they don't like how things are run. Resources: PATTERNSCAPES DECK: https://getpatternscapes.com/ WORK WITH NIKKI 1:1: EmotionalBadass.com/coaching 30 Days to Peace Course EmotionalBadass.com/peace THE BI-WEEKLY WELLNESS NEWSLETTER EmotionalBadass.com/newsletter SUPPORT US ON PATREON Patreon.com/emotionalbadass Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	So what are the physical signs of confidence? How does it look? Because we can fake it till we make it.
0:06.1	There's a big difference between slumping over between shoulders hunched, smaller than you are, kind of cowering, looking at the floor, versus shoulders spread wide, clavicle spread, head up, chin up, eyes forward. So these are the physical signs of confidence.
0:24.1	Let's go through them as this book lays out. Strong posture. Shoulders back, chest out, chin high.
0:30.6	It's like a, I'm taking on the world sort of posturing. We walk with wide steps, not timid little teeny tiny steps. We walk with
0:39.9	wide steps. We're allowed to take up space. Confidence shows up physically in strong hygiene and
0:46.2	personal grooming. I don't care who you sleep with, but I think any of us can see a well-groomed,
0:53.1	sharply dressed, sharply manicured man or woman, and just think,
0:57.9	damn, they look good, right? There's something that exudes confidence about that. They invest in
1:04.1	themselves. And wow, does that make their confidence grow? Holding hands loosely behind the back, that's like a, I'm not threatened, right?
1:14.3	I can leisurely walk. When I read that, I think of the Royals in the UK, because my mind immediately
1:22.1	can picture footage of them that I've just picked up over the years where that's how they walk.
1:27.0	Their arms behind their back as they where that's how they walk. Their arms behind
1:28.4	their back as they stroll their gardens, unbothered, confident, feeling safe and secure.
1:35.3	A confident person knows that they belong. Does it mean they're obnoxiously getting into somebody
1:40.7	else's space? But it's as if they operate from this place of knowing
1:44.7	that they're valuable enough to take up space. Therefore, they do. They approach people with ease.
1:51.2	Right. Yeah, there's an easy confidence to that. What's it feel like to feel confident on the inside?
1:58.3	Now, if you struggle with confidence, I want you to think about that
2:00.9	before I go further. Really think with your mind and then let your body feel. What does it
2:07.2	feel like to exude confidence, to live and act from a confident place inside of you? I find
2:14.5	this to be true. The more confident I am when I'm leading a group, the less my muscles
2:19.2	tense, so relaxed muscles. Easy breaths, right? We're not laborous in our breath, like we've just,
	...

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