You have found the Titus podcast, Armageddon Update, with host Christopher Titus, Rachel Bradley,

and Ken Hyland.

And now, here's Christopher Titus with this week's Armageddon Update.

I'm Christopher Titus, people, and this is the Armageddon Update, the People's House, the White House.

Okay, except for that one time. It's always been the white man's house. And it's under destruction by a con. This ballless grifter will construct a 90,000 square foot ballroom, whereas the White House itself is only 55,000 square feet. Because small men need big things because the things they have

are super tiny, stormy. He got no approval. He got no plans. Same with paving over the Rose Garden.

No approval, no plans. Again, here's the Rose Garden before our six-time bankrupt president.

Here it is now. After the Sith Lord of Skid marks, the Don don of diapers turned it into a strip-maw food court.

Here's what he said about what he was going to do to the White House.

It won't interfere with the current building. It'll be near it but not touching it and pays total

respect to the existing building, which I am the biggest fan of. I know, he lied. Impossible, right?

But let's look at the White House itself.

First of all, the cornerstone was laid by George Washington in 1792. It was supposed to be

finished in two weeks, but it took eight years and was completed in 1800, while the Trump's

ancestors lived in Germany. Just a note, the Titus family had already been here in America for 165 years,

which means you know some Titus were fired from the White House construction crew for being drunk.

And during the war of 1812, the British burned it down. In 1814, President James Monroe moved

back in three years after being told the rebuild would take two weeks. Over the years,

there have been renovations. The South Portico was constructed in 1824 and the North Portico in 1829

during the Monroe and Jackson administrations, respectively. Also, regarding another Monroe,

we had the John F. Kennedy unofficial booty room.

Yeah, you're not going to get that from the White House tour.

...