The Value of Your Spouse’s Birth-Order
Focus on Marriage Podcast
Focus on the Family
4.7 • 1.7K Ratings
🗓️ 5 August 2025
⏱️ 10 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
You and your spouse likely have different strengths. God designed it that way. But are you telling your spouse you appreciate their gifts? Dr. Kevin Leman and Jim Daly share about how a firstborn wife, who loves rules, can still respect her husband, even if he's not as strict with rules. Then, Erin Smalley shares what it means to a wife when her husband encourages her.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | God is at work and he's calling his people to rise in truth. Truth Rising is a powerful new |
| 0:05.6 | documentary from Focus on the Family in the Colson Center. See how ordinary Christians choose |
| 0:11.1 | courage in a culture that needs truth. Watch Truth Rising starting September 5th and find out how |
| 0:17.4 | you can be a part of the change and become an agent of restoration. |
| 0:22.4 | Sign up at truthrising.com. |
| 0:24.8 | That's truthrising.com. |
| 0:30.9 | Well, we've talked on this podcast before about different strengths that people have based on their birth order, |
| 0:40.4 | and it's really good to recognize and kind of call out those gifts and those abilities that your mate has. |
| 0:45.9 | I'm John Fuller, joined by Dr. Greg Smalley and almost Dr. Aaron Smalley. |
| 0:51.3 | They oversee our marriage department, and we're going to listen now to a clip |
| 0:55.3 | featuring Focus President Jim Daly as he talked to Dr. Kevin Lehman, and they took questions |
| 1:00.7 | from a live audience about birth order and marriage. I'm Dina. I'm a firstborn, and my question |
| 1:07.7 | is about that. So I'm curious how, especially for believers who want to honor those traditional husband-wife roles and distinctions, |
| 1:16.8 | how a firstborn wife can lean into those strengths and capabilities without steamrolling a middleborn spouse or usurping their role. |
| 1:26.5 | Wow. |
| 1:27.2 | Well, since you admit you're firstborn... |
| 1:30.5 | Yeah, I'm asking for a friend, right? |
| 1:32.3 | Yeah, exactly. |
| 1:33.0 | You will agree that you know exactly how life ought to be. |
| 1:37.4 | I have a good idea. |
| 1:39.0 | So, when you're making suggestions to your husband, okay, you learn to preface things like this. |
| 1:48.3 | Honey, you know, I might be way out in left field. |
... |
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