I feel of freedom, but I'm not sure if this is a good, I don't know if it's a good or bad.

I don't think it's the kind of thing that's good or bad, but I feel incredibly emotional.

Like right now, I could cry right now talking to you.

Like every time I talk about this and I've been talking about it a lot in promoting the book and touring.

But I've never been able to really tap into those emotions before.

And not to see I was this hard guy because I always felt confident enough of myself to be my full self.

If I feel a certain way, I feel a certain way.

But it's like I'm accessing a part of myself that I have never experienced before.

Hello, welcome. Why is this happening with me, your host, Chris Hayes.

Back in 2014, when I was pretty new to All In, in that spring, there was a man by the name of Freddie Gray who was picked up by Baltimore Police.

He was given what's called a rough ride, which was he was sort of jostled around in the back of that police vehicle.

He ended up dying from his injuries.

That led to massive protests throughout Baltimore

and some property damage and vandalism

and the kind of uprising.

And we covered that.

I covered that for the show.

I was down there.

And in the wake of that,

there was this really upsetting thing

that happened in Baltimore,

which was there was a huge spike in homicide and

...