I amla, your host, your guide, a teacher for Sam and a soft place to fall for others.

I was a miserable failure in my relationships until I love myself enough to be able to share my love

with other people.

Welcome to the R-Spot, a production of Shandalan Audio in partnership with I Heart Radio. Welcome, welcome, welcome to the Our Spot, the spot where we look at relationships, all kinds of relationships,

knowing and understanding that relationships are the healing tools, our concepts of ourselves, our perceptions and concepts of other people,

and our concepts about love. Relationships are all about love. Loving ourselves, loving other people,

loving our Creator, loving life. So the fact that we need love, want love, pursue

love takes us in and out of relationships. And yet, sometimes we can

be in a relationship and think that we're not getting what we want or what we need the way we

wanted and the way we need it and we'll get frustrated, disgusted, upset, disgruntled in that relationship and we'll let it go.

And then a week later, a month later, a year later, 10 years later, we look back and say,

oh my God, that was exactly what I wanted and I had no way of knowing that I

thought they were wrong I thought it wasn't enough I thought I needed more I

thought it I couldn't get it. And that was exactly what I wanted.

Sometimes we let the good one get away. And then when we look back and see them happy over there with Chiquita, we say, oh my God, how come they weren't treating me like that?

How come they weren't giving me that? How come they weren't doing that with me? Well, maybe they were and maybe you just weren't open to receive it.

You know, it's hard because as human beings, we make up in our mind what things should look like, how people should be, how we should

get this or get that or do this or do that. And the truth is we have no clue.

Sometimes we don't know what to pray for. We don't know what love looks like because we've had past experiences and we keep going into our file cabinet and pulling out those experiences and comparing them to what we have

and what we're doing right now.

And we can be totally off the mark. And then pursuing those little human demands, if you will,

sometimes we let the good one get away and sometimes we're the good one and somebody will let us get away and they do it in such a horrific pattern or process, to when they come back and say, I made a mistake, I want you

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