The Kind of Fighting Every Church Needs

The Emotionally Healthy Leader Podcast

Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

Newlifefellowship, Religion & Spirituality, Leadership, Richvillodas, Petescazzero, Emotionallyhealthyspirituality, Christianity, Faith, Peterscazzero, Churchleaders, Spirituality, Emotionallyhealthy, Newyork, Pastor

4.8 • 673 Ratings

🗓️ 26 December 2023

⏱️ 40 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

As we approach 2024, there couldn't be a better time to revisit your discipleship strategy. Here's why...

In North America, we are ramping up towards another election year. For most Americans, this has become a time of increased anxiety, stress, and relational volatility. As a culture, we lack the tools to have difficult conversations (especially political ones) without resorting to blaming, name-calling, avoiding, and "dirty fighting."

Sadly, we do this in the church as well.

For the first 17 years of my Christian walk, this was all I ever knew. I simply mirrored what I learned from my family of origin. My mother yelled and screamed. My father was an appeaser who later exploded in anger. I learned to become an appeaser, which cost me dearly in my marriage, leadership, and church.

For both Geri and I, we had to completely re-learn what it looks like to fight (and negotiate differences) in the new family of Jesus. We now call this skill "Clean Fighting Vs. Dirty Fighting".

I'm convinced every pastor, leader, and church needs this one skill to flourish in 2024.

In today's podcast episode, my wife Geri and I share more about the ins and outs of "Clean Fighting", the final and most important skill of Emotionally Healthy Relationships.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, my name is Pete Scuzeiro.
0:04.9	I want to welcome you today to the Emotionally Healthy Leader podcast.
0:08.2	I'm Pete.
0:09.2	I'm Jerry.
0:10.1	We're so glad you're here today.
0:11.5	Our theme is the kind of fighting every church needs.
0:16.2	The kind of fighting every church needs.
0:18.4	What a great title.
0:20.2	And if any day an age, the church needs it.
0:23.7	It is today. And so there's lots of dirty fighting that goes on in churches and in families and
0:30.9	in neighborhoods and on teams. Workplaces. So it's inside the church as well as outside the church.
0:36.3	And Jerry, why we just list some of the dirty fighting that goes on? Because we have a dirty fighting list in the workbook. I started making a list beyond what's even there in the workbook. You know, the kind of dirty fighting that goes on inside and outside the church that we all do. Things like lying, passive aggressive behavior.
0:54.1	Sarcasm.
0:55.6	I don't know that one was threatening.
0:57.4	Threatening.
0:58.2	Yelling.
0:59.1	Hitting in some cases.
1:00.9	Silent treatment.
1:02.1	Yeah.
1:02.4	Placading, giving in.
1:04.2	One doesn't really want to give in.
1:06.3	Using words like always, are you never?
	...

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