The Fifth Hour: Pastrami Queen
The Ben Maller Show
Fox Sports Radio and iHeartPodcasts
4.8 • 864 Ratings
🗓️ 30 May 2026
⏱️ 38 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Big Ben heads back to the audio sweatshop for another chaotic edition of the Fifth Hour Podcast, spinning wild tales from the Naked City that sound too bizarre to be true. From an awkward run-in with “royalty” at the legendary Pastrami Queen to castles, abstract art, museum snobs, and a Belichickian-style death stare that could freeze lava, this episode is loaded with vintage Maller storytelling. Ben also reveals the universal survival phrase for anyone trapped in a fancy, bougie museum by family members pretending to understand modern art. Plus, a mini tribute to the late great Anthony Bourdain and a preview of the long-awaited return of NFL Book’em featuring new twists like the Maller Hopper. Subscribe, review, and spread the gospel of the Maller Militia.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is an I-Heart podcast. |
| 0:02.5 | Guaranteed Human. |
| 0:05.0 | If you thought four hours a day, |
| 0:08.5 | 1,200 minutes a week was enough? |
| 0:11.0 | Think again. |
| 0:12.0 | He's the last remnants of the old republic. |
| 0:14.8 | A sole bastion of fairness. |
| 0:16.8 | He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter |
| 0:18.8 | the same as the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. |
| 0:22.3 | Wow. |
| 0:22.9 | The clearinghouse of hot takes break free for something special. |
| 0:27.0 | The fifth hour with Ben Mallor starts right now. |
| 0:33.0 | In the air everywhere. |
| 0:37.1 | The fifth hour, the fifth hour. |
| 0:38.9 | The Saturday special is upon us as we are united yet again in the remote podcast |
| 0:44.2 | studio and the bowels of the Mallor Mansion for weekend fun. |
| 0:50.9 | Today, by the way, the last Saturday pod for the month of May, the 30th day, the 150th year, or 150th day of the year. |
| 1:01.2 | There are 215 days left. On this podcast, we have the Pastrami Queen. It's not what you think. |
| 1:08.3 | And hippity hop. And we'll put all those things together. |
| 1:12.5 | And we are going to do an amazing podcast. |
| 1:17.0 | We're going to have a grand old time. |
| 1:19.1 | Well, you'll be the judge of that. |
... |
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