The 12 Principles Of Secure Functioning Relationships
The Angry Therapist Podcast
John Kim
4.6 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 12 December 2022
⏱️ 25 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this episode, John talks about his couples' session with Vanessa, and shares The 12 Principles Of Secure Functioning Relationships their therapist gave them.
Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hi, my name is John Kim. I'm a therapist who went through his own rebirth many years ago |
| 0:05.6 | and I've been documenting my journey ever since sharing my life lessons and revelations. |
| 0:10.3 | I believe in casual or clinical with you instead of at you. I come unrehearsed on purpose |
| 0:16.2 | because self-health doesn't have to be so complicated. |
| 0:21.1 | So my partner Vanessa and I did a couple session and it was long overdue and it was supposed to be the first session was supposed to be three hours and Vanessa and I looked each other |
| 0:33.1 | were like what the fuck we couldn't we didn't have and I've never done a couple |
| 0:38.4 | session for that long I would run out of things to talk about. |
| 0:43.0 | But we didn't have that kind of chunk of time in our schedule, |
| 0:47.0 | so we ended up doing two hours, and it was a great session. |
| 0:51.0 | The therapist is a rock star. She's amazing and she shared with us |
| 0:57.2 | this worksheet and it's the 18 principles of secure functioning relationships and I wanted to share this with you so I could |
| 1:08.3 | put it through my filter and maybe it will be helpful. Okay number one's 18, so we're going to go through them pretty fast, |
| 1:15.0 | because I also want to share with you the homework that we're supposed to do. |
| 1:19.0 | All right, number one, we protect the safety and security of our relationship at all times. |
| 1:26.6 | And like as a dude, |
| 1:32.4 | who was born in the 70s. |
| 1:34.0 | I'm thinking about like physical protection, right? |
| 1:39.0 | The shivery and all that, but that's not what we're talking about here. |
| 1:43.0 | We're talking about the safety and security of the relationship at all times, |
| 1:47.3 | meaning the emotional safety. |
| 1:48.8 | We're talking about protection in that you are not assassinating each other's character, you are protecting the space, right? |
| 1:58.0 | That goes a lot further than physical protection. |
... |
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