This is feminist wellness, and I'm your host, nurse practitioner, somatics, and nervous system nerd, and life coach, Bea Victoria Albina.

I'll show you how to get unst stuck, drop the anxiety, perfectionism,

and codependency so you can live from your beautiful heart. Welcome, my love. Let's get started.

Hello, hello, my love. I hope this finds you doing so well. Welcome to another installment

of the Tenderoni Hotline, where I answer your questions about somatics, the nervous system,

emotional outsourcing, and so much more. If you want your question featured, send a little

email to podcast at Deiatricealbina.com, and I'll be sure to add it to the list for an upcoming episode.

Thanks for tuning in. Let's go.

So our first question comes from amygdala 18. The times I've worked up the courage to be honest with people about my limits or feeling hurt.

I tend to be met with long explanations for their behavior or the conversation gets redirected at scrutinizing me.

This leaves me feeling overwhelmed and ineffective.

Please help.

Oh, my sweet love.

Okay, this one is so painful, isn't it?

So you finally speak your truth, maybe even your voice shakes a little bit while you're saying it.

And instead of being met with warmth, with curiosity, with love, with care, you get like a 10-minute monologue about why they didn't mean it or how your misunderstanding. And there you are, like sitting

with your heart wide open, realizing the whole conversations just turned into damage control

for them. That kind of thing makes your body want to like curl up and never try again and

trust and believe I get it in the depths of my heart.

My abusive ex-spouse did this all the time.

It was part of their gaslighting.

So anytime I was hurt by something they had done, all of the sudden they were so victimized.

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