Tenderoni Hotline #3: Why Boundaries Feel So Hard + Why You Keep Procrastinating

Feminist Wellness

Béa Victoria Albina

Lifecoaching, Mental Health, Holistic, Feminist, Self-improvement, Fatigue, Alternative Health, Feelingstuckinlife, Spirituality, Healthygut, Health & Fitness, Mindbodyconnection, Guthealth, Connectionsbetweenthoughtsandhealth, Education, Ibs, Gutmicrobiome, Feminism

4.9 • 988 Ratings

🗓️ 21 October 2025

⏱️ 14 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Tenderoni Hotline #3: Hello my love! Welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our cozy corner of the Feminist Wellness podcast where I answer your most tender, honest, and heartfelt questions about healing, self-trust, and nervous system care.

In today’s episode, we’re exploring why setting boundaries can feel so hard, and why guilt often floods in after you finally speak your truth. We’ll talk about the deep nervous system wiring that makes boundaries feel threatening, especially if you were raised to believe that love means self-sacrifice. You’ll learn how your biology, past experiences, and systemic conditioning all collide to make boundary-setting feel unsafe, even when you know it’s the right thing.

We’re also unpacking why you procrastinate, even on things that matter deeply to you. Spoiler alert: it’s not about laziness. It’s your nervous system trying to protect you from real or perceived danger. You’ll learn how freeze shows up, how perfectionism fuels it, and what gentle, practical tools can help you shift from stuck to self-led.

This work is compassionate, science-backed, and deeply honoring of your lived experience. Because you deserve to set boundaries without betrayal, take action without fear, and build a life rooted in your own nervous system safety and self-trust.

Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: [email protected]

Order your copy of End Emotional Outsouring here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/

Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is feminist wellness, and I'm your host, nurse practitioner, somatics, and nervous system nerd, and life coach, Bea Victoria Albina.
0:18.3	I'll show you how to get unstuck, drop the anxiety, perfectionism,
0:21.7	and codependency so you can live from your beautiful heart. Welcome, my love. Let's get started.
0:33.1	Hello, hello, my love. I hope this finds you doing so well. I am excited to share with you that we're
0:39.9	going to try something new out here on the podcast, here on feminist wellness. On Tuesdays, we will
0:45.0	be doing a new segment called The Tenderoni Hotline. I'm so excited. So it's questions and
0:51.9	answers to common questions that y'all have sent in. And I'll be
0:56.2	pulling from anchored groups from the somatic studio and other programs, common questions,
1:01.0	exciting questions, fun questions about the nervous system, somatics, health, wellness. And I'm going
1:07.5	to be doing some coaching. So if you have a coaching question or a general question you'd like me to answer on a Tuesday, send it in to podcast at Beatrice, B-E-A-T-R-I-Z-Albina.com, and I will be answering them every Tuesday. We'll see how it goes. If y'all are downloading them, if you're sending an e, it seems to be going well. We'll keep it going.
1:28.4	If not, we won't.
1:30.8	Easy, peasy, right?
1:32.2	So I'm excited to get this started.
1:34.1	I've got some really good questions on deck.
1:36.2	Please do send yours on in.
1:38.4	And let me know if you enjoy this new segment.
1:41.3	Here we go.
1:42.0	The question is, why do I feel guilty for having or setting or trying to
1:47.2	keep a boundary? Okay, this is like, I think we talk about this at Anchored like every five to seven
1:53.6	seconds. It's such an important question, right? So guilt shows up around boundaries because
1:59.0	most of us were never taught that boundaries are a form of love.
2:03.3	We were taught that they're rejection.
	...

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