Tenderoni Hotline #28: What to Do When Family Triggers Old Patterns
Feminist Wellness
Béa Victoria Albina
4.9 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 14 April 2026
⏱️ 18 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Tenderoni Hotline #28: You’ve done the work. You’ve built self-awareness, learned how to regulate your nervous system, and started to trust yourself more deeply. Then you go home and suddenly you’re people-pleasing, over-functioning, and second-guessing everything again. If that feels familiar, this episode is for you.
In this Tenderoni Hotline episode, we’re talking about what actually happens when you return to the environments that shaped your patterns and how to stay connected to yourself without self-abandoning in the process. This isn’t about being perfectly healed. It’s about shifting out of autopilot and into conscious, self-honoring choice.
If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, “Why am I like this again when I’m around them?” this conversation will help you understand what’s happening beneath the surface and how to meet yourself with more compassion and clarity.
Because healing isn’t just about who you are on your own. It’s about who you get to be in the spaces that once taught you to leave yourself behind.
Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.com
Learn more about my courses and apply here: https://www.beatrizalbina.com/courses
Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is feminist wellness, and I'm your host, nurse practitioner, somatics, and nervous system nerd, and life coach, Bea Victoria Albina. |
| 0:18.3 | I'll show you how to get unstuck, drop the anxiety, perfectionism, and codependency so you |
| 0:23.1 | can live from your beautiful heart. |
| 0:25.4 | Welcome, my love. |
| 0:26.5 | Let's get started. |
| 0:31.4 | Hello, hello, my love. |
| 0:34.7 | I hope this finds you doing so well. |
| 0:38.7 | Welcome to the Tenderoni Hubline. |
| 0:41.6 | These are so fun. |
| 0:42.9 | I love answering your questions. |
| 0:44.5 | It's a real blast. |
| 0:46.0 | So let's go. |
| 0:48.6 | All right, here's the first one. |
| 0:49.7 | It reads, this work is beautiful when alone and safe. |
| 0:53.9 | In time, I'm curious how we carry this work out |
| 0:56.8 | when surrounded by the system that created the codependency. I'm moving back home to care |
| 1:02.1 | for aging family. And I want to say, this is so friggin common. Like, I get some version of this all the time. Well, every holiday season, |
| 1:15.0 | I get like, oh, it's like that Romdas quote. Massomenos, I'm not going to get it exactly, |
| 1:20.7 | but it's something like, if you think you're so enlightened, go spend a week with your family. |
| 1:25.1 | Rude. It's so rude. |
| 1:27.8 | But it's so right on, right? |
| 1:29.2 | It is so much more easier to be like a regulated, |
... |
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