Hello, we are transmitting to you from our present, which we can only assume is your distant past, the turbulent time that was the early 21st century.

Fearing the great cataclysm that will surely befall our civilization, we began this monumental reference of strange and obscure human knowledge.

These recordings represent our attempt to compile and preserve wonders and esoterica

that would otherwise be lost.

Whether you're listening from an advanced civilization or have just reinvented the technology

to decrypt our transmissions, this is our legacy to you.

This is our time capsule. This is the legacy to you. This is our time capsule.

This is the omnibus. You have accessed entry 1258.

O.B.0102. Certificate entry 1258. OB0102.

Certificate number 50858.

Surrealistic prank calls.

Hey, is your refrigerator running?

Yes, it is.

Hello, Aaron.

Hey, John. How's it going? Good. Where are you

right now? So, you know, I'm coming at you from sunny, mildly sunny Los Angeles, California.

The only place I've seen you live ever in my life, multiple times, I've seen a moving, John. This is the third time, but I've seen you live ever in my life multiple times. I've seen a moving John. This is the third time. But I've seen you do a podcast here. I've seen you play a show here on a piano, no less. Whoa. You weren't at that show. I was at the regent, yes. The show where I, I like halfway through the song stopped and said,

please forgive me and started again and then and then did it again.

And I think maybe did it a third time.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was like there's that really good line from Mean Girls,

like seeing a dog on its hind legs.

...