STL 53 - Mentors and Management Consultancy

Stellar Firma

Park Tom

Sci Fi Comedy, Performing Arts, Fiction, Improv, Space, Comedy, Funny, Arts, Science Fiction, Sci Fi

5.0 • 878 Ratings

🗓️ 18 December 2020

⏱️ 30 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Episode 53 - Mentors and Management Consultancy

Consultants successfully recaptured, alert level lowered to alternating blue and green strobes. Paradrak Ngelion assigned for orientation.

The client, The Eternal Order of Patriarch Hans, requests fundraising and image improvement advice to help combat the impact of their murderous activities.

Management Consultants' advice: exciting new mission statement; sotto voce logo slogans; bowel cleaning eye machine (unrelated); BANG; dusky glances; self-reflecting commands; vouchers for horrifying products.

Content warnings for:

Emotional abuse
Bullying/taunting
Unhealthy relationships
Cults & cult activity
Alcoholism & dangerous drinking practices
Swallowing SFX
Innuendo
Mentions: zombies, kidnapping, existential crisis, guns, death, injury, blood, poison

Transcript: https://cutt.ly/vhZ2WjE

Special thanks to Penny Dreadful Mess for this episode's Brief Submission and this week's Patrons: Nicole Perlman, Devon, Cayleigh Latimer, Little King Trash Mouth, Joseph P Legander III, Qwenivere, Zsofia M, IRQ, Anna Godfrey, Tony Jasper, Obscura Noxia, Blair Riddle, Agatha Bird, ContestSylveon, Bianca Sofia Ricci, Carly Johnson, Ace Gifford, Emily Mundidyke, Samantha A., Cortue, Kathryn Blair, Hugh Smith, Marianna Jones, Jo, Kasserine, Elizabeth H., Kendra, Isabella Silva, Nuka96, Shy Magpie, Katie Nelson, Sam Quiche, TJ Hummel, SDD, Hannah McGinty, Socket, saintdominicci, Elyssa, Haley, Lane Dolberg, Jamie, Maxwell McCandless, LCR, Samrath Kaur, Emily Of The Beef, Maddie Christie, Jess McKnight, Chloe Artice, brk5239, sunnyletom.

Created by Tim Meredith and Ben Meredith

Produced by Katie Seaton

Executive Producer Alexander J Newall

Performances:

I.M.O.G.E.N: Imogen Harris

David 7: Ben Meredith

Trexel Geistman: Tim Meredith

Paradrak Ngelion: Alison Thea-Skot

KT the Coin Friend: Katie Seaton

Editing: Maddy Searle

Music: Samuel DF Jones

Artwork: Anika Khan

Mastering: Jeffrey Nils Gardner

Featured SFX: LittleRobotSoundFactory, Clearwavsound, rombart, schatzl0, laiaoreka, michorvath, artefakt, geodylabs & previously credited artists via freesound.org. Original Foley by Maddy Searle.

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Hello there will be a
0:02.0	Giesman here. I am absolutely delighted to be able to inform you
0:05.0	that after my aggressive letter writing campaign
0:07.6	and subsequent armed standoff,
0:09.6	I can confirm that there will be a cabaret night at the Cosmic Lounge, an evening of song, and also
0:16.4	other songs. These songs will be made available to you, the general public, at 5 p.m. every day from the 25th of December until my demands are met
0:25.4	or the 31st of December whichever is sooner. This will be available to you wherever you get your
0:30.6	podcasts and also on the rusty quill YouTube channel whatever that is.
0:36.3	May the board preserve and keep you.
0:39.2	Special thanks to petty dreadful mess, may you never eat what you think is an apple only to
0:43.5	discover you just try to eat a delicious looking rock. Rusty Quillill presents Stella Fermere. Oh, Caution. Clone temperature rising. Okay, well I can tell you're a bit
1:39.6	cross David and I think here's an idea I think you should calm down because everything's going to be fine.
1:45.0	We were happy in the cafe and you had to go and hunt about and do your big words and talk to people and now we're here we're back in it.
1:53.7	David David David you might have been happy I was drowning David I was drowning in a well of
1:59.1	aniquity that wasn't life that was a living death you're just like a zombie
2:02.4	except you
2:03.2	handsome zombie I was obsessed about careers and promotions and meaning you can't just be
2:09.0	happy living anyway what are we supposed to? We've been put in this room and, well, quite frankly, the shift is almost over, so this is pretty familiar.
2:18.0	Although, is this what it's like for you?
2:20.0	Yes. Because I've never, I've never had this 20, 22 and a half to 23 hours just in the room.
2:25.2	And I'm going to do, I'm going to say David, it's a bit boring.
2:27.7	I don't think you should bother.
	...

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