Sex in Marriage: Communication, Connection + Healing Past Wounds Around Intimacy
The Intentional Parents Podcast
Intentional
4.9 • 1.6K Ratings
🗓️ 11 March 2026
⏱️ 61 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this episode, Brook and Elizabeth sit down for an honest conversation about sex, intimacy, and connection in marriage. We begin with a few updates — including reflections from the Fatherhood Retreat, the upcoming Intentional Motherhood Retreat, and an update on Elizabeth’s back surgery — before diving into the topic.
Just as the gospel reminds us that we are fully known and fully loved, marriage invites that same kind of vulnerability. Yet many couples carry shame from past experiences, including sexual abuse, pornography, cultural messages, or purity culture wounds, and those things often affect intimacy in marriage.
We also discuss some of the common differences between men and women. Many men tend to feel emotionally connected after physical intimacy, while many women need emotional connection in order to feel open to physical intimacy. For many moms especially, exhaustion and constant demands can make intimacy feel like one more need to meet. Often, simple shifts in communication and care can make a significant difference.
Throughout the conversation, we emphasize that intimacy is not just about physical consumption or emotional communication alone — it’s about a deeper connection where emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy work together. That requires honest conversations, clear expectations, and a willingness to serve one another rather than compare our marriage to outside expectations.
We close with a few practical invitations for couples this week: have one calm conversation about sex, initiate non-sexual affection, and spend time praying together. Husbands might also ask their wives a simple question: “What helps you feel safe with me?”
If this conversation was helpful and you’d like to hear a part two on this topic, email us at hello@intentionalparents.org.
Scripture Mentioned: Genesis 2:25, 1 Corinthians 7:4 + Ephesians 5:22-33
Submit Questions: Send a voice recording to hello@intentionalparents.org, mentioning your name and where you’re from.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Attention mothers. We have the intentional motherhood retreat in Franklin, Tennessee in April, April 23rd, through the 25th to be exact. And if you haven't gotten tickets yet, we want to remind you, grab some tickets. We have group rates. We also have volunteer tickets. So if you're looking for a discounted ticket and want to come help a little bit, go to our website, Intentionalparents.org, get your tickets. |
| 0:24.3 | Megan Fait Marshman's going to be there, where the Eskridge is going to be there, Elizabeth and Diana sharing, and other guests that you don't even know about. |
| 0:27.4 | Plus, incredible worship, can't wait to have you all there. |
| 0:30.0 | See you soon. Welcome back to the Intentional Parents' Podcast. |
| 0:57.5 | Today we are going to talk about sex, intimacy, and marriage. |
| 1:01.2 | We're going to talk about a husband's perspective, a wife's perspective, what's needed, what's not. |
| 1:06.7 | What does the Bible say? What are practical things that we can do if this is a hard thing to talk about also, |
| 1:12.0 | maybe even to move towards in your marriage? And I get to do that with you, my wife, today, |
| 1:17.0 | because it would be weird to have this conversation with your parents. I didn't think about that. |
| 1:21.0 | Yes, it would be weird. And it would also be weird for you to be having this conversation with |
| 1:26.6 | somebody else. |
| 1:28.2 | That wasn't me. |
| 1:34.0 | Well, that is just a taste of the level of fun awkward we'll have this week. |
| 1:37.5 | Actually, this is coming from a really interesting place. |
| 1:47.9 | We are coming off of the wonderful high of the first ever intentional fatherhood retreat. And I mean, it is something to process. We are still processing it in real time. I just got off the phone with somebody |
| 1:51.6 | about different angles and things that they were processing. I mean, it has been an ongoing |
| 1:58.4 | situation this last week or week and a half since we got back. And so, I mean, what was, I mean, this was great. You actually spoke there. You got all the men gave her a standing ovation before she even talked, which was great. And you were one of the only female communicators, which we were so glad. And I'm so glad you spoke there. Thank you. It's not easy to talk in |
| 2:17.6 | front of 600 plus dudes, but they made it easy. They made it easy. But what, tell me for you, I mean, |
| 2:23.8 | we will process this in other places and have conversations, but for you, what was the, |
| 2:28.7 | what was some of the highlight for you for that? Gosh, I just keep saying it felt like such an honor to be in the room and to get to watch |
| 2:39.2 | uh what the holy spirit was doing one that was incredible um but i think the thing that will never |
| 2:47.9 | leave me and will forever change i think like, like, how I even communicate to men and |
... |
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