The following podcast is a deer media production.

Hello everybody, welcome to the Bitch Bible podcast. I'm your host Jackie Shimmel.

I just wanted to let my listeners know that I have started a whole new wellness initiative.

I am kickstarting a new movement in 2020. It's called Shimmergy. It's where we live in a world

of transparency and, you know, blow the whistle on bullshit and mass media manipulation geared

towards vulnerable women and capitalizing off their despair by insisting that some deep breathing

a jazz hand and a series of vague, non-descriptive metaphors will guide them to eternal happiness.

But only after the check is cleared. And a 5, 6, 7, 8, here we go. Where the fuck do I even begin

with this shit? Now, if you follow me on social media, you might know that I posted a video

of Julian Huff experiencing what I could only describe as an exorcism. If you listen to the show,

you know that me and Jules have a long term, one-sided, distant, strained relationship.

And 48 hours prior to me posting said video, I was shadow band and had been shadow band

on de gram for upwards of six months. Once again, six fucking months. They lift my shadow band for

I think 43 hours. And I very diligently posted this video of Julian Huff having her energy

cleared by some kook ass doctor. And I live with that. I will stand by it, clearing her energy.

She is convulsioning. She is levitating. She is jazz hands. She is doing a trunk lift,

which by the way, not impressed. Let me tell you something about Jackie Farkin Shimmel. Not an

athlete and not a dancer. But if you think that I didn't win the trunk lift competition in the

fourth grade at my elementary school, you are sadly mistaken. It was my party trick in my short

stint of college. I can trunk lift with the best of them. I've got a spine that's made of gelatin.

So come for me, Julian Huff. So basically, this is what happens. I post the video. I elude it to

the exorcist. I go to sleep. I wake up the next morning. I get a text message from fucking

...