You're listening to a Stranger podcast, www.com.

If you're stuck in a relationship quandary, or if you're looking for sexual harmony,

while there's nothing you can't ask on the Savage Lovecast. Valentine's Day is a weeker than you can't ask on the Savage Lovecast.

Valentine's Day is a weekend and change away.

And when you're a sex advice professional, as I am, you get a lot of calls in the run up to Valentine's Day asking for sort of boilerplate love and romance advice from bullshit publications that the rest of the year

pretend that sex doesn't really exist.

And what they want is usually this bullshit, you know, deep fried funnel cake, sugar-coated romance crap.

And not real, you know, how do you sex up?

How do you spice up your valent? That's what they ask me about. How do you sex up? How do you spice up your valent?

That's what they ask me about.

How do you make it more erotic?

Right?

And what they want to hear is like candela's and dinner and wine.

And chocolate.

What's crazy about all the standard Valentine's Day gifts is that they all have narcotic effects, really. Go out and have some

wine and eat a big, rich meal, and you're really not going to want to fuck when you get home. You're

going to want to fall to fuck asleep when you get home. And then you get all these letters, if you're

a sex advice professional, as I am, the day after Valentine's Day from people who are worried about the

health of their relationship or whether their partners really attracted to them because they

went out and had this big romantic Valentine's Day date and dinner and then they didn't

fuck because they fell asleep or he fell asleep and well of course he fell asleep. He had a gutful

of steak and booze and rich crap. You know, if you

...