S1 Ep120: Side Boob & Stained Holes
Hello Dysfunction
Hello Dysfunction
4.8 • 1.9K Ratings
🗓️ 25 March 2021
⏱️ 111 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This week’s podcast recommendations are:
• Radical Musings with Rosanna Arquette!
• Sword and Scale episodes 177, 178, and 180.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hi, welcome to episode 120 of Hello Dysfunction with Potterfria and Crystal and I'm already |
| 0:27.8 | on Tuesday and I'm already ruining the week. I'm fucking everything. So yesterday at like 6.30 in the |
| 0:36.6 | morning, I was stepping over the puppy gate. I had stuff in my hands. My foot caught. I went shoulder |
| 0:46.7 | first into the corner of the wall. Like there was no way to brace myself. I have a big bruise on my |
| 0:51.2 | knee, my shoulder. So I instantly started developing this gnarly bruise. So I call my mom at like 7 in the |
| 0:58.7 | morning and she starts telling me about her and my pop at the LA airport and I start screaming, |
| 1:07.6 | dying, laughing and she goes, I don't know why you're acting like you didn't hear this before and I was |
| 1:12.2 | like, I'm like, bitch, I haven't and I'm telling everybody. Telling everyone. How long ago was this? |
| 1:21.2 | Ah, probably four years. Not that long ago. No. So they were going up a steep escalator at the airport |
| 1:28.3 | and the woman in front of my mom stepped back. So of course my mom went to step back and lost her |
| 1:33.6 | balance. My pop tried to catch mom. Nope. They both fell back. Like roly pulleys. So they're flat on |
| 1:43.2 | their backs, feet hurt on the stairs of the escalator. Going up the escalator like drunk starfish. |
| 1:49.7 | Like just flat on their backs and when she told me that, I was screaming. Could you imagine the fear |
| 1:56.3 | of possibly sliding? Yeah, we're older. You know, we're really good to go. And I'm still screaming |
| 2:01.6 | laughing. They turned off the escalator. They made them. They were like, get up. They |
| 2:07.3 | get up. Roll over. Roll over and get yourselves up. They made them wait for medical professionals. |
| 2:15.6 | That's so embarrassing. So then today, I'm out. My dad's in the trailer park. I've made this |
| 2:22.7 | fucking U-turn for the last 15 years. I cut it short this time. I ran over a water pipe. |
| 2:32.0 | Water started shooting everyone. It was a sprinkler. I'm in the trailer park community. Yes, |
| 2:38.1 | it started flooding. I had to go tell the manager. I was I felt so bad. |
| 2:43.7 | Was are they going to make you fucking pay for this? I said, you snapped the thing off. |
| 2:47.2 | Yes. And I'm like, do you want my insurance information? They're like, no, it's fine. |
... |
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