We're looking for all of the little ways that we can catch them out.

And even if we don't think we're showing that, it's going to come out in the form of passive aggressive energy when we meet someone we really like.

Because the stakes are higher, whatever insecurities or worries are lying beneath the surface, all of a sudden

come out because they're exacerbated by our fears in this situation.

Now, there are three things that we do early on in a relationship.

And by the way, for anyone who's in a relationship and deepen, these are just as relevant

to you.

But there are three things that start right at the beginning that so many people do,

and I want to at least draw awareness to them today.

The first one is spying on someone.

Sometimes the ways we do this are minor.

They're not things that someone else would notice.

It becomes a kind of snooping.

We might look on their social media to see the last time

they were active if we haven't had a text back from them in the last three hours. The problem with

this behavior is that it has us focusing on the wrong things. Instead of focusing on the average

of their communication, their behavior towards us, we're looking for all of the little ways that

we can catch them out. And even if we don't

think we're showing that, it's going to come out in the form of passive aggressive energy

when we're with them. The second insecure behavior is comparing ourselves to other people.

I know so many women that immediately upon dating a guy start to worry about other women that are around.

Are they more beautiful? Are they funnier? Are they a body shape that he's going to like better?

...