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Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Reducing Reactivity (Without Becoming a Doormat) with Sharon Salzberg

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Being Well

Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.8 • 2.7K Ratings

🗓️ 9 February 2026

⏱️ 70 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What is mindfulness really? According to one fourth-grader, "Not hitting someone in the mouth." Legendary meditation teacher Sharon Salzberg joins Rick and Forrest to discuss how we can work skillfully with anger, fear, and reactivity without becoming doormats or numbing ourselves out through the lens of her new children’s book Kind Karl. They explore the protective function of anger, and how we can create more space by relating differently to our thoughts, emotions, and sense of self. Sharon shares a Buddhist lens that links anger and fear, and how looking closely at “what’s in the anger” can help us get clarity without collateral damage. Along the way, they talk about the difference between healthy moral anger and the habit of anger, how to extract the positive energy from difficult emotions without getting burned, and how lovingkindness and self-compassion can be active, strengthening forces.  About our Guest: Sharon Salzberg is the co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society, a world-renowned teacher of mindfulness, and author or co-author of 14 books including her seminal work Lovingkindness and her first children’s book Kind Karl: A Little Crocodile with Big Feelings. Key Topics: 0:00: Intro and Sharon’s new children’s book 1:30: Rick and Sharon’s personal history 3:40: Making abstract concepts direct and simple 6:00: “Mindfulness means not hitting someone in the mouth.” 12:30: Equanimity, reactivity, and our relationship with pleasure and pain 26:48: Healthy moral anger and outrage 34:17: How mindfulness decenters the self 43:53: Decoupling identity from states of suffering 50:23: Dissolving boundaries, self protection, and loneliness 1:03:09: Recap Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Go to Zocdoc.com/BEING to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hello and welcome to being well.

0:08.7

I'm Forrest Hansen.

0:10.1

If you're new to the podcast, thanks for listening today.

0:12.6

And if you've listened before, welcome back.

0:15.0

I'm joined today by two very special guests,

0:17.8

first clinical psychologist Rick Hansen.

0:20.2

So dad, how are you doing today?

0:21.8

I'm great and I'm psyched. And before we go further, I want to say that I consider Sharon,

0:27.3

our guest, to be a personal teacher of mine, someone I hold in tremendous esteem.

0:32.5

And resting in that feeling is actually, I think, a really important thing for people in general,

0:39.1

period, even if it somewhat goes against my aging hippie egalitarian nature.

0:45.8

Well, as you just said that, we are here with the co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society,

0:50.6

a truly world-renowned teacher, and the author of 14 books, Sharon Salzberg.

0:55.5

Sharon was one of the first people to bring mindfulness and meditation to the mainstream

0:58.5

American culture over 50 years ago, and her books include her seminal work, love, and kindness.

1:04.2

But she was very young then. You can see pictures of her. She was a little, little cherub.

1:09.8

So young. So young. So young. And also her first children's book,

1:14.8

which just came out, Kind Carl, A Little Crocodile with Big Feelings. And this was co-authored with,

1:20.2

I hope I say this correctly, Jason Gru. So Sharon, thanks for joining us today. How are you doing?

1:24.6

I'm doing really well. I'm actually in Barry, Massachusetts,

1:35.4

next door to the Insight Meditation Society, which is going to turn 50 since we started it.

1:39.7

All of us were really children, you know, at the time. So you guys have known each other,

...

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