Re-release: What to Look for When Choosing to Love Someone

The Angry Therapist Podcast

John Kim

Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.6 • 1.1K Ratings

🗓️ 18 May 2026

⏱️ 21 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What should you really look for when choosing someone to love? In this episode, John Kim explores why attraction alone is not enough to build a healthy relationship. He breaks down how instant chemistry can sometimes come from old patterns, why emotional intelligence matters more than intellect, and how self-awareness, consistency, and the ability to create safety are essential in love. John also shares why strong relationships are often built around something bigger than the couple itself, whether that is shared values, purpose, family, creativity, spirituality, or service. This episode is a reminder to look beyond the spark and ask what kind of relationship you are actually building. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Instagram teen accounts with automatic protections on who can contact teenagers and the content they can see.
0:06.0	Instagram teen accounts have contact limits on by default,
0:10.0	so teenagers get messages from people they know, not strangers,
0:14.0	and default content settings.
0:17.0	Plus, teenagers under 16 can't change these default settings without parental approval.
0:23.0	So parents can help teenagers connect safely.
0:26.5	Learn more at Instagram.com slash teen accounts.
0:29.8	And I get that we all have our taste.
0:32.2	I have my preferences like everyone else.
0:34.5	But also, why not stretch?
0:36.7	You know, why not if you're out dating, go go
0:39.0	the other way, you know, go, go meet some people that are not your type and see what happens.
0:53.0	Hi, my name is John Kim, and I'm a therapist who went through his own rebirth.
0:57.0	I share my feelings and revelations. I believe in casual or clinical and with you instead of at you.
1:04.0	I come unrehearsed on purpose because self-help doesn't have to be so complicated.
1:11.1	So I get a lot of clients who want to know what to look for when choosing a partner.
1:18.0	And I did a video about this, but I wanted to go deeper.
1:22.5	So first, let's talk about attraction because I think that's the obvious. That's where we start.
1:29.6	And before, I thought attraction was very simple. I thought it was two-dimensional. I thought it was
1:35.0	feeling-based. I thought it was basically you see someone and they're either, you're either
1:41.1	attracted to them or you're not. And I used to believe in that whole meat eyes across the room.
1:47.3	And when you know, you know all of that, which I now believe is movie magic and programming and all the Disney movies and all of that.
	...

Transcript will be available on the free plan in 10 days. Upgrade to see the full transcript now.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from John Kim, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of John Kim and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.