r/Confessions I Stole an Ancient Egyptian Artifact

rSlash

rSlash Reads Reddit

Comedy

4.9 • 10.6K Ratings

🗓️ 19 January 2025

⏱️ 16 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

0:00 Intro 0:07 Itching powder 2:39 Work project 8:08 Observe 10:45 Museum thief 13:02 Comment 13:55 iPad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:24.5	Sign up for your $1 a month trial at Shopify.com slash setup.
0:29.8	Welcome to R slash Confessions, where O.P. puts itching powder in his roommate's
0:34.7	fleshlight.
0:35.7	Our next credit post is from Equivalent Cup. I put itching powder in my roommate's fleshlight. Our next credit post is from Equivalent Cup.
0:37.8	I put itching powder in my roommate's fleshlight.
0:41.3	We lived in a small flat with one bedroom.
0:43.8	I never used the dishwasher.
0:45.8	He turned his fleshlight inside out when he put it in.
0:49.3	In the beginning, he would leave it to soak in the bathroom sink.
0:53.3	I protested vehemently, and as some have suspected here,
0:56.6	I couldn't afford to move. He would leave it on or beside his bed after use. So I had this thing
1:03.9	in my sight whenever I was in our room. He would use it while he thought that I was sleeping too.
1:09.6	He had poor hygiene to begin with, a messy fella.
1:13.1	He was coddled at home and his mom cleaned up after him.
1:16.9	He'd use it and then just go to sleep without cleaning up.
1:21.2	We shared an internet package which would be depleted before the month ended because
1:25.3	of his adult content addiction. I tolerated this
	...

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